That Christmas Card Moment

I used to be a loyal viewer of Jon and Kate. There was something comforting about seeing other people having to do the same mundane tasks that every parent does, but with a greater number of children. I stopped watching, when the show became an infomercial for various resorts around the country and demonstrations of the latest toys. I couldn’t resist watching the latest “vow renewal” episode, since TLC hyped the show, with glossy slow-motion filming and a new pull-at-your-heartstrings song, but the episode fell flat.

I actually feel sorry for Kate. She seems to live her life, as a series of photo-ops. As long as she has the beautiful 8x10 of her family in impeccable, carefully chosen clothing, she doesn’t care if anyone is actually enjoying themselves or having a good life. You can see the glee on her face, as the family lines up for the “one big photo” or is forced to do the canned events that in her mind constitute a “perfect family”; oblivious to the looks of disdain on everyone else’s face. I think these photos and staged moments are how she justifies her choices. The problem is she is forcing her family to dress-up and sit for the “Christmas card photo,” every day of their life.

How sad that such a beautiful ceremony would only be witnessed by strangers; including the strangers that posed as “family.” The Bible verses on the cake, the flowing gown, and the perfectly painted fingernails do not make the “perfect wedding.” The top hat, the caroling, and the gingerbread nativity do not make the “perfect Christmas.” Kindness, Love, Respect, and Sincerity are the only components you need for a “perfect day.” If only Kate would write that on a 3x5 note card to hang on her cabinet.



Submitted by Ll774

48 comments:

Denise said...

I have to agree if Kate weren't such a witch w/ a b, I'd feel sorry for her too. As a mom of older children I know it's the little every day things that make memories for your kids, not the over the top paidcations KON take.
I do however feel very sorry for her children b/c they won't have "normal" childhood memories

Samster said...

The vow renewal ceremony was truly flat and lifeless, as well as pointless. Also, the way they did it, and the things they said, made it a slap in the face to their families and everybody who participated in their original wedding. Ironically, that event was much more joyous and festive because their friends and family were there.

The Hawaiian ceremony just felt very empty. If I were them and watching the show, I would have felt embarrassed. And it seems that much of what they do now is to spite their enemies. The mansion thing is definitely to spite all their haters in Berks County, because they had kept intimating they wanted to go to NC. Kate hates, hates, hates, HATES the long, cold PA winters. And that would have been much more convenient for their film company.

There is an ivory tower mentality to the show. And now they've moved into the Konpound, further removed from reality. This thing is turning into Citizen Kane, or should I say, Citizen Kon? I have a feeling the original house they bought in Wyomissing was their Rosebud.

Sidney said...

I watched some of the reruns recently, and I did feel sad and do feel sorry for the whole Gosselin family. When watching the reruns I was reminded of why I did fall in love with this family a couple of seasons ago. They did have some struggles. John did go to work. Kate did use coupons and the little kids were hugged, kissed, and held. All of them. This is a sad family now. Money truly is not everything.

Ravello said...

Thanks for such a well thought out post that pretty much sums up the life of Kate KON.
I am just shocked at how much she seems to have changed. I watched the original specials the first time they aired and she was a very engaging, pleasant, likeable person. There were only a few specials filmed, perhaps she was able to edit her behavior and personality for the cameras. Maybe she was a more genuine person back then.

Nowadays, I don't sense an ounce of warmth or likeability in Kate Gosselin. She seems to be a very cold, calculating superficial person.
I do not sense much of any maternal love from Kate, other than her obsession with her precious Hannie. She seems profoundly disconnected from her 3 boys, she mostly shuns them.
The vow renewal in Hawaii was a total sham, designed to generate TV ratings and money.
Apparently she has no relationship with her parents orher MIL. Jodi, Kevin, Beth apparently have been cut off.

Appearances mean everything to Kate but she is kidding herself if she thinks we are buying her act. I know some sheeple still defend her, I sense the tide has turned against her.

Life is definitely a photo op to KON.

pam said...

Much of this is true, but it is true for all reality show families. The photo-ops, the product placement- the Duggars and Roloffs do the same stuff. It's just part of the game.

Sabrina Klaus said...

Material things don't make people happy. It is what comes from your heart. Kate hasn't grasped that. She thinks by creating this life for her children that she is doing the right thing but in the end it will ruin her and her children. How could pushing everyone in your family aside make you happy? I know some people say that Jodi deserved it and it is THEIR (or as Kate would say "ARE" life) but quite honestly I hope someday they wake up and discover that the money wasn't worth it.

There was one episode that Kate cried when she reflected back when it was just the twins and she commented on how "when things were a lot simplier." I actually did feel sorry for her at the time BUT she NEVER made any steps to change the route they were taken. She still grovels and tries to take every free thing she can get her hands on. Who are they to say NO!?!

fxfanatic said...

You stated all of this "perfectly".

The woman is delusional if she thinks all the "awesome memories' she's creating won't be written about in some Mommy Dearest type of book (s).

WENDY said...

Bingo! You hit it right on the mark. Kate's all about image. I think she's very much of a 'keeping up with the Joneses' kind of a person. Nothing feels real or of any substance. Very well put post.

Gregory House said...

I am only reminded of why I initially like this show when I see reruns of the first 2 hours. Too bad that it is only 2 hours out of many.

PickleShmickle said...

Oh I completely agree with this post. Childhood memories come from parents being silly, parents being creative, parents being loving.

Some of my best memories star my mother, and my mother being incredibly funny, silly, not thinking about herself in the slightest.

Every christmas my mom would make meatloaf and mashed potatoes and would attempt to reenact A Christmas Story with us FOUR kids. She would say, "Dig IN!!" and we would eat our dinner with NO utensils whatsoever. You can imagine the mess four kids would leave after that!

But fast forward twenty nine years and those are the memories I love to go back on more than any other. The gosselin kids have NONE of those. It's incredibly sad.

mainemom said...

I wonder when the show is over, the crew has gone home and the money is gone, will Kate remember how to love her kids the way us regular moms do? I too loved the show, sadly I used to let my kids watch it. They got a kick out of the little ones. I've now banned the show at my house for obvious reasons. I'm afraid that the kids get more love and attention from the crew, what will happen when they're gone?

KONspiracytheory said...

Samster said...
There is an ivory tower mentality to the show. And now they've moved into the Konpound, further removed from reality. This thing is turning into Citizen Kane, or should I say, Citizen Kon? I have a feeling the original house they bought in Wyomissing was their Rosebud.
-------------------
Wow, Samster, you really nailed it - I think the Citizen Kane analogy is the most fitting one yet (excuse me, Citizen Kon - now there's a fantastic username up for grabs!!!).

Virginia Lawyer said...

Yes, everything seems contrived, even the play session we saw ONCE in the living room with duck-duck-goose. It was pretty obvious Kate had never played that with the kids before.

She doesn't understand that memory moments don't have to be elaborate. One of my best memories is of playing paperdolls with my cousin as a little girl and the feeling of the breeze coming in the open window, and us giggling as the paperdolls flew across the room and seemed to float.

I agree with you, this is a very sad family all penned up tightly in their Konpound. Wonder if Kon themselves think it was worth it.

hula girl said...

Can you explain to those of us who have never seen Citizen Kane

dotsicle said...

I feel so sad for these children. I do hope that when the cameras go away, they can enjoy what is left of their childhoods.

snowfunkk said...

LI774, you have written a post that hits the nail on the head. I feel so sorry for those children who have to live their lives in front of the cameras.

My husband and I took our children more than half way cross-country for a Disneyland vacation when they were not quite 4 and 6 years old. The trip was mostly for us adults who desperately wanted a vacation. Our kids are now teenages and while they had a blast on the trip, they really only remember a couple of things now that they are older. In fact, while on the trip they kids asked one night what we were going to do the next day and I excidedly said, "We're going back to Disneyland and Mickey and Minnie!" and our daughter said, "Oh shoot, I wanted to go back to Chuck E. Cheese!" So it really is the little things that little kids enjoy the most!

Becca said...

I completely agree. She isn't living her life, she is living what she thinks life should be...

shawna said...

I agree with so many of you.

I enjoyed the showed when I could relate to daily struggles of parents trying to raise their children. Now it is one endless vacation and self-promotion tour!

How about taking the reality show Survivor and making the castaways live in a very swanky penthouse, give them a full-time chef, someone to wash and fold their laundry, housekeeping, daily facials, manicures, pedicures and let's not forget the Wii.

It would and is the same thing. Just not real anymore.

ThreeFarmers said...

A few years ago, I decided to take up knitting. I read book and watched videos and participated at a knitting message board where there were many old pros to give me tips.

When my skills started improving, I decided I was going to knit this complicated cabled sweater for my father (who's 80 years old and has always considered me a bit of problem child)for Christmas.

I worked and worked and was so proud of my final creation that I quickly boxed and wrapped it up and took it to his house and put it under his tree.

On Christmas day, my Dad pulled the sweater out of the box and was pretty impressed that, at 40, his daughter finally mustered the attention span to complete such a lengthy project. He immediately put the sweater on and discovered that the sweater had one sleeve was about 3 inches shorter than the other, wonky shoulders, and a collar that practically strangled him.

Well, everyone had a pretty good laugh at my expense, but Dad has worn that sweater every Christmas since.

The good stuff is sometimes the imperfect stuff. Perfect vacations fade, it's all the crazy, wonky stuff that really make memories.

Irish-Gal said...

I think KON is just a classic example of how money doesn't fix all your problems.

Harriet said...

Kate has a shribbled heart and soul.

Sable said...

How sad that no matter how the kids are feeling that day, they must dutifully "smile" for the camera. I remember when Kate was making a cake for July Fourth with the girls. She yelled, screamed at the girls to stop eating the leftover strawberries, and then immediately after that she made them squeeze together and "smile" as she took their picture in order to make memories! Oh, they will remember!

chicago teacher said...

Honestly, I feel we are seeing totally staged episodes at this point. What we see as viewers are events that are developed primarily for the t.v. show. I think Aunt Jodi's sister called that with the vow renewal.

It's a funny thing that those who comment at GWOP are called envious and that's why we have problems with the show, that we covet their life of freebees and special treatment. I actually USED to covet their previous life - 8 beautiful and healthy children, the often unaffordable opportunity to be a stay at home mom, and friends (like Beth) and family (like Aunt Jodi)who surrounded the family with support and love.

My envy has turned to pity - one day Kon will realize what they have lost (may not be today, or tomorrow) and they can hopefully piece it back together.

RuthinVA said...

You know "perfect is as perfect does." That's where the problem comes in with Kate the DOES part.

spoiledmom said...

You are so on spot! It couldn't have been said better! It has always been for "appearances".
First, the tummy tuck, then, when Kate was there for that, she wanted a boob job, when Dr. Nice told her she didn't need anything but a better bra, you could see the color drain from her face, or the red creep in. From that moment, I saw the different side of Kate. Next we get the twins modeling, to which the agency was not too keen on using them, IMO, Kate just fabricated some "excuse" as to why they weren't going to do it. Then the wardrobe shows, the "new bag" Jon just happened to remember for Mother's Day. The hair plugs, the teeth whitening, ("I'm not going to sit next to you with your teeth whiter than mine..") All of the travel shows and the hither tither and yon,
appearances on tv shows abound. What does it really come down to? Appearance.
From what we know of how she has ostracized her family, when appearances are gone, what does she have left? The twins and tups are not going to be young, sweet, and "cutesy" for long. It is already wearing thin.
When the children get older, are they going to look back at all of this and "see" what was really going on? Mommy wasn't really there for them. Mommy didn't really play with them, let them use markers, let them roll in the grass, eat melting ice cream, chew gum, go barefoot through the grass. Mommy was there for the cameras, yet Mommy wasn't smart enough to figure out the camera's were "on". Therefore, at the end, we all got to watch this fairytale of Kate's slowly come to an unhappy ending.
One episode I can never get out of my mind is the one where the tups were sick with the flu and she made them sleep on the laundry room floor. How sad. When my daughter is sick, I sleep with her or we sleep on our couch together, "sick bowl" beside us. All I can think about is comforting her and how to make her feel better. I never think about what I am going to have to clean up because of it. No, I do not have 8 kids, but I have do have 2, and the compassion level should be the same no matter how many children you have.

marypoppins said...

In the beginning the episodes were about SURVIVING SEXTUPLETS and TWINS. I found the show interesting because it was a family doing regular things with lots more kids. Now its a show with a family doing activites that regular families cant even afford

the wedding episode staged staged staged- I thought much ado about nothing.
I wonder if the the producers editors cringe when they think about that episode.

RuthinVA said...

Actually I think It is pretty is as pretty does, same point though

happytobe notsoperfect said...

I come from a family of 8 kids. The Christmas when I was about 9, we were living in a small motel room for a few months while we waited to move into our new house. My mother was 6 months pregnant with my youngest brother (#8) and very sick. We were all cramped and had the flu. It was a nightmare. My parents decided that they had had enough and moved us all into our new home on Dec 23. The house wasn't finished yet. The floors weren't in yet, the bathroom fixtures weren't up yet, you get the picture. The only furniture we had was a kitchen table and our matresses on the floor. We had a Christmas tree and not much under it. My parents had been unable to shop so we each got only 1 or 2 things. To this day, when we gather for Christmas, we all agree that that was our favorite memory of our childhood. Certainly our favorite Christmas. We truly learned what it means to appreciate what you have and be happy just to be together. I'm reminded of this when I think of the Gosselin 8 having their first Christmas in their new home. When they grow up will they remember this as their favorite Christmas? I hope so but I think not. Could they not only survive but be happy and appreciate a Christmas as bare as the one I had as a child?

Perfection always has a crack. Jon and Kate have an obligation to teach their kids how to roll with the punches. Too bad they've never learned that themselves.

Libby said...

You are so right! That describes her fantasy so correctly. She probably remembers dressing her Barbie dolls and fixing their hair...and of course since they are dolls, they never got dirty or messed up. They never ruined their little outfits with sticky messes like suckers and cupcakes or stained them with markers and paint. The vow renewal, was boring beyond belief. But one more opportunity for Kate to dress up her dolls and pose them for the camera, but yikes...they did not co-operate, they are getting too old for her games and have being exercising free will, moving about without her permission and heaven forbid, not evenly distributing the leis. Now that she appears to be sedated, she is "going with the flow" ya, right...she's just too stoned to flip out!

tmc said...

Becca's Comment: I completely agree. She isn't living her life, she is living what she thinks life should be...
-----------------------------------
I totally agree with the comment. This is so true. Though I don't agree with Kon and hate what they are doing, but in a way I feel so sorry for them. They will never know how to make life fun spontaneously. Sometimes when the most unexpected things happen, it makes life so much more interesting, who needs so much structure.

Just my own personal thoughts.

flmomto5 said...

Great post,and oh so true. I also used to be a fan of the "old school" J&K. Now all they have become are wanna be over the top celebrities. I cannot imagine the stress of that family between filming the show, the travels, appearances, etc. Heck, I am going crazy trying to get one kid to soccer games and one to dance class and trying to maintain a sense of normalcy during the holidays.Living life in general is hard enough, but the G's, they are going to give themselves an early stroke or heartattack if they do not slowdown, and the poor kids, I feel sorry that they have never known a normal childhood. And probably never will. I am sure Kate is trying to make one of them the next "Hannah Montana", you know to keep the money flow coming in.

Fan said...

Long time lurker, first time commenter.

I was appalled when Kate kept referring to her first wedding with distaste. I can't remember her exact words or wording, but she pretty much said that her first wedding meant nothing, and that this renewal wedding was her dream wedding and meant the world.

Sometimes I don't know if I should feel sorry for Jon or what, because he's Kate's puppet but at the same time...

Maria said...

I have a relative who is similar to Kate in some ways. She has three children, and she always wants them looking picture perfect. There is much fuss about wearing the 'right' clothes and having their hair perfect. There is a lot of stress everytime she takes them for a professional picture, which is way too often. The kids don't have fun at all because their mom is too worried about appearances and won't let them have fun. No dirt, no markers, no sticky, foods, etc. It just drives me crazy.

Sugarpop said...

This is very similar to a comment I posted under the "Recent Church Appearance" post. I said that it's not that Kate & Jon were ever "broke," it's that they didn't have enough money to live the life that Kate thought they SHOULD live. If clothes and cribs that didn't match would have been good enough for her, she would have had a lot more to begin with, but she wanted everything "just so."

It's the same with the college funds and weddings she keeps mentioning - they'll have enough money to do things the way us "common folk" do, but Kate will want everything to be "perfect" so of course it will cost a lot of money.

pinkdiamond611 said...

I don't know Kate or Jon. But from what I see from T.V., and what is said in interviews, Kate seems to me to be trying to fill a void from her childhood. That is why she was always so obsessed with making perfect memories and taking pictures of the kids. I have noticed that she is not taking as many of her own snapshots now. I think she even realizes that it is not "real". When you watch the repeats, you get a sense of how much things have changed. Jon used to "fight" Kate on her obsessions, but now he just goes along. . . It is all in a days work for him. Also all the loving people in the children's life are no longer there. On the 4th of July show, Jon made a comment how they go to Beths house EVERY SUNDAY! Now they go NEVER. I don't think it ever was about money why Jodi and Beth were cut out. I think they put Kate in a bad light, they were shown as loving and caring and nurturing to the children, and the children were shown giving back that love. More than ever was shown given back to Kate. jmo I hope Kate is able to fill the void in her life, but she seems to be getting more unhappy instead of more happy and fulfilled.

somewhereinoh said...

pam said...
Much of this is true, but it is true for all reality show families. The photo-ops, the product placement- the Duggars and Roloffs do the same stuff. It's just part of the game.

12/05/2008 9:24 AM

Unlike the Gosselin family, if you were to remove all the reality tv 'game playing' there still remains an element of REAL LIFE substance to the Duggar and Rolloff families.

Ams said...

I too was a loyal viewer back when they didn't plug every single thing under the sun. I mean really. You look ridiculous. There is just no sincerity in these people. They act like empty-shelled robots with only $$ on the brain.

RuthinVA said...

Great post,and oh so true. I also used to be a fan of the "old school" J&K. Now all they have become are wanna be over the top celebrities. I cannot imagine the stress of that family between filming the show, the travels, appearances, etc. Heck, I am going crazy trying to get one kid to soccer games and one to dance class and trying to maintain a sense of normalcy during the holidays.Living life in general is hard enough, but the G's, they are going to give themselves an early stroke or heartattack if they do not slowdown, and the poor kids, I feel sorry that they have never known a normal childhood. And probably never will. I am sure Kate is trying to make one of them the next "Hannah Montana", you know to keep the money flow coming in.

___________________________

But can you imagine if you had a driver to take your kids to soccer and dance lessons, had your clothes layed out for you or at least brand new that you just slip into. Had all the fees paid for you. Could sleep in because you husband does not work. You are the very reason Kate compares in such a harsh light. Those of you that try to help your children enjoy life and do the things they want and find enjoyment in, the simple and nornmal are giving their children a childhood. Look at the lessons your children are learning by playing soccer on an organized team not to mention the friends they are making. The grace you child is learning from dance the team spirit and moreover the fun they are having. If these are the things your children want to do you are the type mother I salute. You give to your children in ways Kate has yet to learn. You might be going crazy but you are also bonding and having fun with your children and they are learning to cope with others, that they might no always be the best, sharing secrets with team or dance mates and staying physically fit. So it might be a crazy time but I know you are enjoying it, I see Kate week after week trying to convince herself she and her children are enjoying life.

SmartyQ said...

I have to give Queen Freebie Irene credit for getting what she wanted, which was, of course, lots of money. I think Prince Ka-Ching and their children are incidental to her desire to have money and to spend it on herself.

I do not expect QFI to change her raison d'etre no matter her circumstances. She'll squeeze the last drop of blood from a Roosevelt dime or the last bit of joy from any of her children's lives to keep her in the circumstances to which she believes she is entitled.

I do not speak lightly when I say I believe she is seriously mentally ill and dangerous to anyone who gets in her way.

Tracykay said...

This is what bothers me about it also. They just seem too stressed out and I think it is all the cameras and crew, that would be enough to drive me crazy. How much family alone time do they have? It seems when they aren't filming one or both parents are out of town. The family moments for TV don't really srike me as moments to remember because there are so many people around.

Petunia said...

I am sure Kate is trying to make one of them the next "Hannah Montana", you know to keep the money flow coming in. I got that impression too. Too bad she's too lazy to get her children into the lessons for singing, dance, so forth and so on. They have no personality and their not all that in the looks department and, as it is, and Kate's too lazy to deal with having to do the work with getting them to classes to learn to be something other then angry little horrors.
If the sextuplets get a show just to stumble around looking lost because OMG sextuplets then Disney really has gone to hell. Looking at Disney's recent track record nothing would surprise me but I can only hope they haven't totally gone around the bend.

ELR said...

I have watched for probably about a year and see Kate as being less obsessive about some things. The one thing that's always bothered me is how she's afraid her kids will get dirty. That's just crazy. The real reason I am posting though, is can someone quickly fill me in on what happened with Jodi and Beth? I don't understand what everyone's vaguely referring to. Thanks.

louise said...

Are their other sites of Jodi and Julie other than 'hatred breeds..'
If so, what are they??? Please and
Thanks.

ryamcshme said...

Kate seems to me to be trying to fill a void from her childhood. That is why she was always so obsessed with making perfect memories and taking pictures of the kids.
--------

This reminds me so much of myself. Kate reminds me of me and that scares me(I swear I'm not that evil though!) I love reading everyone's comments, it reminds me to calm down and let my kids be kids and just have fun with them.

kate is a cocky bitch said...

regarding the question about other sites for Aunt Jodi, as far as I understand it her sister's blog is the only one, however other blogs have reposted the same info that was on that one. I commend Aunt Jodi for speaking out and totally understand her need for privacy. Sadly it seems like besides GWoP there are very few others who will dare question Queen Kate. Why are people so afraid of her???

Phyllis said...

hula girl: Can you explain to those of us who have never seen Citizen Kane

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Citizen_Kane

Somewhereinoh said...

kate is a cocky bitch said...
regarding the question about other sites for Aunt Jodi, as far as I understand it her sister's blog is the only one, however other blogs have reposted the same info that was on that one. I commend Aunt Jodi for speaking out and totally understand her need for privacy. Sadly it seems like besides GWoP there are very few others who will dare question Queen Kate. Why are people so afraid of her???

12/06/2008 11:16 PM

IMO, the reason 'they' are not speaking out is not because they are afraid of Kate, but are making choices that are the best interest of protecting their own personal lives and family, reputation, careers, standing within the community /church etc. IMO, those who know the 'truth' are of the thinking that J & K are responsible for their own choices in life and the controversy that follows.

Sarah said...

pinkdiamon611 said--Also all the loving people in the children's life are no longer there. On the 4th of July show, Jon made a comment how they go to Beths house EVERY SUNDAY! Now they go NEVER. I don't think it ever was about money why Jodi and Beth were cut out.
_______________________

Once again, we don't know that they NEVER go there. Uh, pindiamond, this is an edited show. We don't see all that this family does.

Until I see an article or Beth or Kate say something to me about it (ha! like that'll happen), then I am going to not believe all the hoopla about a falling out.