Movie & A Catch recap

After seeing the horrific promo of Kate wearing a popcorn bucket on her head like a drunk at a company Christmas party and screeching “Come and get your popcorn!” in a voice that was sure to have caused hearing loss in the crew, I had instant regrets of volunteering to do this recap. Let’s see if I was wrong, shall we. continue

122 comments:

fostersmom said...

After seeing the horrific promo of Kate wearing a popcorn bucket on her head like a drunk at a company Christmas party and screeching “Come and get your popcorn!” in a voice that was sure to have caused hearing loss in the crew, I had instant regrets of volunteering to do this recap. Let’s see if I was wrong, shall we.

We start with a minor miracle. Well, two minor miracles. While Kate is inside cooking a real meal (#1), they show one of the babysitters outside at the pool with the kids (showing her is #2). You know, Kate the single mom just making dinner for her kids while the babysitter keeps them from drowning. Single parenthood is hard, y’all. She instantly is shown on the couch saying that she’s at the house a lot of the time, Jon’s there some of the time, and there’s no rhyme or reason to that. Comments like that must be that high road and the not speaking bad about him she’s always talking about when it comes to direct questions about Jon. Too bad it’s largely an untraveled road. We’ve all seen the pictures, lord knows I get enough links sent to me daily by a certain site that will remained unnamed, and we know that Jon spends just as much time at the house as she does. In fact, let’s do the math. Let’s see... Friday she was in Cleveland, Monday and Tuesday she was in New York, Wednesday she’ll still be there to tape Friday’s episode of The View, and Thursday she’s going to be in North Carolina. So yeah, while doing math on “a lot the time” is a fluid equation at best, this doesn’t seem to add up to a lot of the time any way you figure it.

Okay, back to the episode. Can do Kate is going to grill on her brand new grill. She’s never grilled before, but she’s going to figure it out. Here’s a tip for you, Kate. It’s just like cooking inside, but in the yard. Put food on grill, cook, don’t burn, eat. There’s even a picture on the front of the grill to show you how to light it. Back at the couch of martyrdom. She’s so overwhelmed now, she can’t deal. She’s running the world. She’s got to travel and work and leave when it’s Jon’s turn and then come home and clean the house, buy food, and fix the world. Apparently, according to what Kate is implying, Jon must be letting those kids throw wild parties and starve to death while she’s gone. That must be what’s in all those UPS boxes she picks up, she must have the groceries shipped to her at Kinkos! That has to be, cuz all we ever see her buy at Target is paper towels and I don’t think the kids will eat those. She continues on that she’s sad and lonely at night. And this is a test of survival and determination. Oh hell, give her the Oscar now. Best role in a dramatic performance, Kate Gosselin! She’d rather be outside, but she has to feed the kids. Here’s a thought... go play with your kids and have the babysitter cook. I’m sure she could handle pouring dressing over chicken and making deviled eggs.

Mady comes in and starts to help Kate. Ohh... she’s directed to RECYCLE something! One glass bottle. Which is handed to her over a mountain of plastic bags full of stuff on the kitchen counter. Kate takes the chicken outside saying she’s worried she’s going to serve her kids raw chicken and give them all “sammonella.” That must be a close cousin to the better known salmonella. She starts by poking at the grates on the grill with tongs. That’s helpful. Joel comes us and says “Mommy, we do fun stuff only when you’re here.” Insert your own theory on the babysitter being the one to play with them here.

fostersmom said...

She cooks up what looks to be at least 2 chickens worth of pieces and says a prayer. “Dear chicken, please do not give us sammonella. Love Kate.” Recycling and prayer, TLC is hitting all our complaints with this one. They all sit down to eat, on paper plates and with plastic utensils, the kids seem to be enjoying it. I see a grill covered up on the patio. That’s the one that Jon used when he cooked their picnic dinner around the birthday episode. Looked perfectly fine to me, but I’m sure they needed a new one. I guess Kate’s chicken prayer didn’t work, Cara gets bloody chicken. Kate laughs this off and says “oops” in the interview chair. Who knows, maybe sammonella doesn’t run the risk of severe illness like salmonella does. Kate can’t bother to check herself and has the babysitter inspect the poisonous food she just served her child. Ashley confirms the raw chicken.

After their food poisoning dinner, Alex the sound guy sets up “Kate’s” idea of a movie on the lawn. The kids pull the sound guy’s hair, climb on him, hit him, and generally get in his way. I guess Kate and the babysitter were both busy, so Alex had to watch the kids. Then Clark, another crew guy, carries in a popcorn maker. He should have brought instructions. This turns into a complete debacle. It’s really not that hard to use a popcorn maker, my nephew used one at school last year when he was 10 and I used one at a job at a snack bar in high school. But I can tell you they are hot and letting your kids sit next to it while you all but pull the pan out onto them is a bad idea. While this is going on, Kate’s got the bucket on her head. We finally get the screech. So, not only did Alex the sound guy get abused by the kids, he’s partially deaf now too? I hope he has workers comp. Finally they all have snacks, they have their sleeping bags, and they watch their movie. Kate marvels that she stayed awake. The girls all stayed awake, but the boys all fell asleep and she had to carry them in. She martyrs again, this is when she knew she was a single mom. Normally Jon would do the carrying, not her. I find this a really sad statement. Not because she had to carry them, but because she willingly gave up those moments in the past with her kids.

Back from commercial, we get more martyring. Jon’s turn is here and Kate has to leave. She lugs various suitcases, shoulder bags, and plastic bags out to the car. As she’s doing this, she tells the kids to look out the window. Why? So they can see mommy take loads of crap out of the house like she’s preparing to leave for a month? Why doesn’t she have a set of things where ever she’s going? Leave some clothes and necessary items there and just take a small bag with personal items that she only has one of with her. But hey, that wouldn’t be as big of a production for the kids to witness every week, so why do that? She proceeds to “take the high road” again and tells us how sad she is when she leaves, she hates it, but she’s not sure if Jon feels the same way or if he feels relief when he leaves. Nice. She goes on and on about how horrible it is leaving them, do the kids know how much she loves them while she’s gone, and she squeezes out a voice crack. The dramatically sad music wells in the background. Really it does, I’m not even being a smartass there. And Kate gets in the car to leave. Such a woefully tragic tale. This is the part of the lame Lifetime movie where you start laughing because it’s just so over the top that you can’t help yourself. You know it should be sad, but it’s not.

fostersmom said...

With Jon’s turn finally here, we get the kids playing in their Crooked Houses. Bet you thought we’d never see those again! I know I sure didn’t expect to see them. Jon tells us he’s decided on an awesome activity. You take a barbed wire, tie it on the end of a rope, and let the kids whip it around and hope they don’t snag each other. Otherwise, he’s taking them fishing. Having fished with little kids, I’d say his description of events is pretty dead on. But I would add, that you also hope they don’t hook you either. Cuz, um, not that I would know, but that hurts. He’s taking them to a creek that runs along the property line between his and the neighbor’s house.

In the biggest surprise of the episode, Jon tells us that his mom came to the house and offered to take Mady and Cara out for the day. Mady chose to go and Cara chose to stay, she wanted to fish. We know that the tups got no choice, cuz dammit there’s an episode to churn out, but baby steps, people, baby steps. That’s right, we had a grandparent spending time with these kids! And a kid not having to film! It’s a miracle! Two miracles! Best miracles of the episode.

Since it’s been raining forever, the kids have to cross a muddy cow pasture to get to the creek. As they walk, there’s only a few minor “ows” heard from kids getting poked with fishing poles. As they get to the super muddy part, we start to get tears. Joel starts to cry and Jon has to go back and get him. He says “you’re such a wimpy” and takes Joel’s hand. Now, I know it’s not good to tell your son he’s a wimpy, but there was a hell of a lot more love and affection in his voice than earlier in Kate’s part when poor Aaden said he didn’t have a fork and Kate barked at him to look around his place. Jon knew there would be tears about the mud, but he didn’t care, he wanted the kids to get over their fears and away from the house. As kids of 5 and 8 are apt to do, they don’t last long before they want to go back to the house. They weren’t catching anything and it was hot. They perk back up a bit when Jon catches a tiny fish and they get to see it and touch it. Since they are all hot, muddy, and smell like cow poo, they head back to the house and hose off. Jon says he wanted the kids to not have a bad image of fishing since it can be a relaxing sport.

fostersmom said...

They all clean up and head in the house to make homemade pizza. They have balls of dough and are stretching them out on the kitchen island. I find a bit of irony here. Kate, the one coming out with the family cookbook, won’t let her kids help her in the kitchen, but Jon’s got them making pizza. Hee! They briefly grilled the dough outside. Jon’s using that old grill that was used as a water stand while Kate grilled. Huh, guess they didn’t need that new grill. The kids assembled their pizzas. He had Cara put the sauce on and then all the kids did their own toppings. Back on the grill the pizzas went. The kids all had pizza for dinner, went out to play, and conked out early.

Fishing, take two. This time they drove someplace instead of trudging thru a muddy, poo filled field. They went to a local pond. Jon sets up the kids poles, casts them out, and hands them over. Alexis gets one right away, she yells out “I catched a fish!’ You can hear all the guys on the crew tell her good job, that was really cute. She reels it in and Jon helps her so she doesn’t cut herself on the fins. Leah and Joel get one too. The kids are all excited about fishing. Collin is shown walking about with his pole with a fish on the end. The little kids are shown in their interviews talking about how many they caught. There’s one minor meltdown when Aaden accidentally hits Joel in the head with a fish. The nanny who doesn’t want to be seen (not the same one Kate had) does a quick check and hug and he’s fine. Jon tells us he tries to spend as much time as he can with the kids because his time is limited now. He does his version of Kate’s martyr act, but minus the martyr and all the dramatics. He doesn’t even get music. He misses the kids, it’s hard to leave, it’s stressful, but he’s making the best of the situation while he’s in New York and not with the kids. His version is much less sob story, over the top melodrama than Kate’s was. He wraps up the episode at the pond telling us they all had a good day and it was fun.

All in all, if you cut out all the parts of Kate talking, this wasn’t as painful as I thought it would be.

dede02 said...

Great recap, Fostermom! only thing you forgot (i could be wrong) is when Mady asks to help Kate in the kitchen, (recycling the bottle) Mady says quietly, I LOVE OUR NEW KITCHEN!I'm sure she wasn't promted! (sp?) I do think the time Jon spends with the children is really geunine. unlike Kate, who declares, since she has limited time with the children she has to things "bigger & better" or something to that effect! Also, i really liked it when one of the children Joel said "we only have fun when you're here! lol. PS-can't wait for Kate's grilled chicken recipe from her cookbook!

Ohio Buckeye said...

How many slams per paragraph did Ms. Martyr make?

Let's count: she's 'home' with the kids MOST of the time/Jon's there SOME of the time (ding!);

then she has to come home, unpack, STRAIGHTEN the house (from Jon's mess presumably) (ding, ding!);

she has to buy food (because Jon doesn't?) (ding, ding, ding!);

she hates being away from her beloved children/Jon probably enjoys his time away from them (ding, ding, ding, ding!)

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner: K8 Gosselin is our High Road Taker again tonight!

Big round of applause for Katie Irene, who devotes all her time to loving her children, 'running the world' (in her dreams), and taking that high road.

No wonder she's always so exhausted.

Fostersmom: Your writing is great - creative, insightful, and funny as hell! THANK YOU!!!

Old North State said...

I had to turn it off when Kate was whining on the couch the first three minutes. "I'm lonely...I realize other people have lives...I have to fix the world....overwhelming....overwhelming...::whimper:: I just couldn't take it! She is so fake! She will be at the Southern Women's Show in Charlotte this week and I have had to look at her mullet-headed picture in the newspaper for about two weeks now.

Thanks For the Recap said...

Thanks for the recap.

It's sad that TLC doesn't get that a show of Jon with the kids is much more enjoyable because it's genuine. Of course, perhaps I should be glad they're betting on Kate... much more likely that it will tank!

Miranda said...

It made me so angry to see Kate's version of "recycling".
She emptied the bottle of marinade onto the chicken.
She recapped the bottle.
Then she handed it to Mady and told her to recycle it.

Proper recycling involves rinsing a bottle and throwing away the cap.

Leave it to Kate to make everyone's jobs more difficult, all to save her a precious few seconds. Her life is just so difficult you know.

JFS in IL said...

Yeah, poor sad Kate having to leave her kids so Jon can have his turn - she can hardly bear to leave them - WAIT A MINUTE - who has been zipping off to do book signings and appearances etc for over a year? Kate sure didn't make sad noises about leaving the kids THEN!!!!!

And thinking she has to make BIG memories - hate to break this to ya. Katie Dear, but it is the small, daily things that stick with a kid - how a parent would tuck them in at night, or tend to a boo-boo, or roll around in the grass having a ticklefest...

HW said...

I actually tuned in just in time to hear Kate say that part about this being a test of survival.
Then I got mad and switched the channel.
Survival? You mean like the test my son will endure in the Marine Corps? Like the test my friend is enduring as he battles cancer? Like millions of Americans are facing with job losses?
Kate's test of survival sounds pretty easy to me....

SeriouslySerious said...

Great re-cap! Nice job with the 'commercials', too! Grilling? K8?!?!? Ugh! Oh, no! A thought just flashed in my mind...Grillin' Wid K8 by Katie Irene Gosselin. Cookbook #2. Food Network here she comes! Actually, I would watch that comedy.

Favorite line(s):
She cooks up what looks to be at least 2 chickens worth of pieces and says a prayer. “Dear chicken, please do not give us sammonella. Love Kate.” Recycling and prayer, TLC is hitting all our complaints with this one.

Amen, Fostersmom! Amen.

mmmsoap said...

Ack, I caught that "we only have fun when you're here" comment too...seemed like the poor kid was put up to it, similar to the prompted comments at the birthday party earlier in the year.

What drives me crazy is how clearly the producers have picked sides in this: Kate will forever more be depicted as the heroine, while Jon is the bad guy who apparently they'll permit to still parent, as long as they can't figure out how to stop him. He takes the kids fishing, but it's a hot and sticky day so things don't go as well as planned. How long do they need to spend on the couch with Cara, the boys, and then the little girls, explaining how much they hated it? (At least they got the token 3-seconds of "but the next day was fun" in.)

Pa Mom Knows said...

"And thinking she has to make BIG memories - hate to break this to ya. Katie Dear, but it is the small, daily things that stick with a kid - how a parent would tuck them in at night, or tend to a boo-boo, or roll around in the grass having a ticklefest..."

She just doesn't get it, does she? And no amount of "therapy" from Dr. Phil, or advice from anyone close to her (does she have friends or family?) is ever going to be able to make her understand the things of which memories (true memories) are made. She's still stuck on the material issue -- the trips, the "culturing," equating those things with memories. That's not what it's all about, and maybe one day, way into the future, she'll realize this, but by then, it's going to be too late. It's really sad for the kids.

konspiracytheory said...

Here's some Khate math to ponder:

She says something along the lines of "I'm here most of the time, Jon is here some of the time", but later says she has to do everything in a big way for the kids (I'm not even going to get into how ridiculous that is) because she only has half as much time with them as she used to.

Which is it Khate? Are you there most of the time, or half of the time? Hard to keep track of the lies, isn't it?

Pony said...

Does anyone besides me find it intriguing that in this particular divorce, the mother has become the "Disneyland" parent, while the father is the one doing the normal kid things? I wouldn't be surprised if Joel didn't believe his comment that "we only do fun things when you're here" - she's the one who takes them to the beach, the dude ranch, etc. She has managed to set it up so Jon takes them to the dentist, etc. OTH, one day, I do believe, the kids will realize which parent was the "realest" and be grateful.

BTW, as a single mom whose kids are now grown, I too am sick of hearing Kate whine about being a single mother. The day I see her doing laundry at midnight, trying to figure out whom she can ask to watch half the kids while she takes the other half to the emergency room, etc. I may feel something other than disgust for her. In the meantime, she should shut up already about how hard it is to do it all alone - with the nannies, the PAs, the bodyguards, etc.

It's just a show said...

The show is obviously completely scripted now and there's no telling what a typical day in the life is for either of them. The part where she loaded the car one suitcase at a time was quite dramatic and nauseating. Their every day life is probably very uneventful and you can see how each event in each episode is not only thought up by someone but all the props purchased and put together for both of them. Dress up clothes from Target. 8 fishing poles. Popcorn machine, movie screen and projector. Scavenger hunt stuff in bags. Remember, they don't have to pretend to be real. They can just say it's only entertainment. Remember that movie about exposing that game show in the 50's as being fixed and they said "so what? It's just entertainment." and they got away with it. Their attitude is that the viewing public is supposed to know it's only entertainment and the one's that get fooled ... oh well (shrug).. they shouldn't be so naive.

The child exploitation part is very real, however.

tomo718 said...

Fostermom, thank you for the recap, I skimmed over most of the Kate crap. I found the Jon stuff very nice, now if he will go get a real job.

I don't get Kate about carrying her children to bed. I'm childless not by choice, my older brother and I are about 18 years apart so my nephew and I are about 10 years apart in age. When my nephew's 4 year slammed a steel door, I yelled at him about how dangerous that was and how he could have hurt himself. The showers turned on and alot of explaining and back rubbing was done. He fell asleep in my arms like his father did, and it's the most wonderful feeling in the world. Why doesn't she cherish a moment like that??

Willow #1 said...

Fostersmom: GREAT recap, as ALWAYS. You are really fab.

beyond tired said...

mmmsoap said...

Ack, I caught that "we only have fun when you're here" comment too...seemed like the poor kid was put up to it, similar to the prompted comments at the birthday party earlier in the year.

Yes, it was very, very fake just like later Alexis says to Kate "you've never grilled before". That is so obviously being repeated. A kid, on their own wouldn't say "grilled" and they wouldn't know the stereotype gender assigned to grilling.

I saw something today that's given me a different perspective. It was an episode from 2008 and the kids were coming down the stairs on Christmas morning Joel and Collin are in the front and as they come down Joel keeps trying to take Collins hand (3 times) but Collin jerks away. They were told to do that. And then I thought of that ride with Alexis and Collin sitting together and suddenly Alexis reaches over and jerks Collin around the neck and Kate fawns over it saying they were so cute and sitting like a little old man and little old lady. I always thought there was something wrong with that picture and now I know what it is. Alexis is looking up with an expression that said "like this?" and poor Collin looked uncomfortable and miserable and it is now obvious to me that it was all set up.

In fact, the show has been scripted from the start and if they could get the kids to cooperate then they were scripted at times too. Then I started to see it through Kate's eyes. Acting is kind of like being fake. It isn't lying, it isn't being fake or phony... it is acting. So she will never understand what everyone is saying here because she see's herself as an actress in the entertainment field. This is how she justifies everything and will do anything for ratings.

liz123 said...

I have never posted but just had to today.... if she was in the health care field shouldn't she know how to properly say salmonella?

Tami said...

I guess when Hate sees this episode she will know that we all know Jon DOES feed them when they are with him and she probably only has to buy food because wants her to have to do something other than sit in the driveway and go to the FedEx place. hee hee.

jibbers said...

I find it hilarious how TLC edited Kate's departure. She was faking the sad face, and the cries while throwing in little cheap shots at Jon (I'm not sure how he feels about this, if he's happy when he's gone and what not)..

At the same time, sad music is playing. This went on for 5+ minutes.

Then, when it was Jon's turn, no sad music was playing and he got about 20 seconds to talk. LOL

The only good thing from the show is, Jon didn't give up when the kids said they hated fishing. The very next day, the kids went and they all enjoyed themselves.

Keep in mind Kate would have given up after the kids complained and never taken them fishing ever again.

Also, I noticed some friends or relatives joining Jon and the kids at the pond. One lil Asian girl was hugging one of the sextuplets while Joel was crying because Aaden accidentally hit him on the face. Jon also allowed Mady to hang out with his mother. This is good that the kids are being exposed to other family members.

Unlike with Kate, who no longer speaks with any of her family members or friends. This is why Kate is "lonely". No one can stand her. Not even her father.

Kate is SO FAKE. It's good to see no one is falling for it. Jon on every episodes acts the same. He didn't change as much as Kate did. Kate is pretending to be a new different person. To bad we're not falling for it.

elyse said...

What is with the frantic need to "create memories". Kate seems to feel that a good parent must be bigger, longer, faster, higher. All the while she is "creating" her memories she is speaking more to the camera people that to her children, in fact if I think back, I have never actually seen her have a conversation with her kids. Jon on the other hand is creating the real memories for his kids. Catching a little fish will be source of pride for those kids for the rest of their lives, not their mother in a popcorn box hat screeching like a scene out of Mommy Dearest. The kids are certainly showing signs of needing more stability and less memories. Harassing that poor sound guy required some sort of correction and NOTHING. They are beginning to be "Jon and Kate with their out of control eight"

Megan said...

@ JFS: you are completely right

The 'memories' that matter most are the every day ones. For example, I can remember the way my mom's makeup smelled when she would come in my room early in the morning to give me a kiss before she left for work (as a nurse).

Do the Gosselin kids have memories like this? How could they when they're being dragged here there and everywhere and their parents are practically calling it in. So messed up.

Anonymous said...

First time poster but I have read for awhile. You have a gift of writing and how you managed not to poke out your eyes watching this woman act like a mother is beyond me. This train wreck has got to end soon before one of the kids (Cara or Mady) go crazy.

kerensa32 said...

With so many women (and men) out there raising families on their own, or with little spousal support, it makes me sad that she has turned her own experience into such an overwhelming one. I have been alone with my 5 kids for almost 6 months now, and I have had one night out in the whole time. I don't have a nanny, or a cook, or people to do my laundry or send me free things. And yet, I manage and I enjoy myself at least 90 % of the time. If she could cut out some of the trips and book signings and outings for herself, she might find she would not feel so overwhelmed and miserable. I don't think she realizes how difficult it is for the public to muster sympathy for her when she has so much assistance, and so much money. The average viewer is probably struggling paycheck to paycheck and not given so many opportunities for "big" memories.

Jen.S said...

Great recap fostersmom, always love your recaps, spot on and so funny! Hopefully Kate will get the message to keep some clothing and personal items at where ever she goes when she leaves the kid’s house for Jon’s return, great suggestion and the kids don’t have to feel like she is leaving for a month. But as you said, that won’t be as big of a production. Kate and her dramatics and too bad for what the little ones need, she doesn't care because she comes first.
I’m not surprised that Joel is the one that comes up to tell Kate that they have fun only when she is there, seems to me that he is the one she influences in that way and if he fails there is always Hannah. And I mean no offense to either child, just hate the way Kate uses them to say certain things on cue.
Oh, and the chicken on the grill, wonder if that will be in Kate’s new cookbook…LOL…she can’t even cook chicken on a grill, must be a book of cucumber sandwiches and the like.
I’m so sick of Kate’s whining!
So glad that Cara and Mady were offered a choice to go fishing or shopping and that Mady got some one on one time with grandma and a break from filming. And I agree that it’s just too bad that the other six don’t get the same offer, maybe later they will get to choose too, at least when Jon comes over.
Glad to hear that Jon was determined to show the kids fishing regardless of the whining and crying about the discomforts of heat, cow poo and mud, imo that builds some character and a will to finish what they are doing even when it’s not comfortable to do so. I’m sure if Kate had been there she would have been running them back to the house as soon as they hit the cow pasture or before if she would have done it at all and she would have been berating Jon on how stupid his ideas are, etc…etc…
Good for Jon!
Was good to hear about the pizza’s Jon let the kids make, more hands on from Jon, way to go Jon!
Thanks fostersmom!

rural mom said...

Lets review what Kate's ambition to be a tv star has done to her family.
#1 Complete alienation of family members. The kids have no grandparents, uncles, aunts or cousins. They have production crew to hug and tussle with.
#2 Complete alientation of daddy. The kids get limited time with Jon and a whole lot of bad press about him being suicidal, drunk, whore mongering, etc.
#3 Complete alienation of Mommy. Kate shows up for film days but otherwise is off chasing her tv career.
#4 Lies Mommy tells to defend this. It is all for the kids - really, you getting a tv show and doing that instead of mothering them is for their benefit?
#5 Lack of childhood. Katie dreamed of being a tv star when she was a kid. Now her kids get to star on her show and do without a childhood.
I am with Jon on despising Kate and her ambition, bringing 8 children into the world to further your tv career is cold, calculated and sick.

chesterctymom said...

Pony said...


BTW, as a single mom whose kids are now grown, I too am sick of hearing Kate whine about being a single mother. The day I see her doing laundry at midnight, trying to figure out whom she can ask to watch half the kids while she takes the other half to the emergency room, etc. I may feel something other than disgust for her. In the meantime, she should shut up already about how hard it is to do it all alone - with the nannies, the PAs, the bodyguards, etc.

You are right on!!!

By the way, my fav part of fostersmom's recap is...

'He does his version of Kate’s martyr act, but minus the martyr and all the dramatics. He doesn’t even get music.'

Love it, no music!

bobbie said...

It's just a show said...

The show is obviously completely scripted now ...Their every day life is probably very uneventful and you can see how each event in each episode is not only thought up by someone but all the props purchased and put together for both of them...Remember, they don't have to pretend to be real. They can just say it's only entertainment...


Wait, if they say that then won't they be admitting the kids are "child actors in a scripted series" and therefore come under child actor laws? Don't think Jon, Kate or TLC wants that!

Not a fan of either said...

I didn't watch but I'm reading here that she used bottled marinade! How stupid is TLC??? I read that she said her crookbook will be out next fall and they are showing that she can't cook. I am always amazed at this hot mess. Show sounds boring, glad I didn't watch, haven't missed anything since I quit watching months ago. Thanks for the recrap!

TK said...

I don't watch the show any more, but even if I did I wouldn't have tuned in after seeing that awful screeching promo!

Thanks Fostersmom, great recap once again.

cancel this trainwreck said...

Am I the only one who thought, when Kate was loading her stuff into her shiny black SUV, and told the kids, wave out the window...that there were no kids even there? This part was totally FAKE! I even went back through it, because I thought maybe I would see a kid in the door. They weren't even there! How can you keep 6 5 year olds from bum rushing a door is beyond me. Plus, why wouldn't they just go outside? OH, because they weren't even there! She made it seem like it was so hard and sad on the kids, when in reality they weren't home or even by the front door. FAKE FAKE FAKE. As FAKE as her tan.

Moons in Leo said...

fostersmom, nicely done! So glad you survived watching this misery and were able to post a hilarious recap.

SafetyTrain said...

Awesome awesome recap. I didn't watch the show but I caught the commercial with Kate screeching about the popcorn (which, if I was planning to watch in the first place would have made me not want to). Right after that she told the kids that the popcorn would cost them $500+ each. Yeah, what a witty and appropriate joke coming from the mouth of a woman who forces her kids to support her. Like 5-year olds are going to get a joke about movie concession stand prices Kate. Shows yet again that she's just desperately playing to the cameras and not focusing on her kids at all.

Natalie said...

So a woman who doesn't know how to properly grill a piece of chicken is going to sell cook books to Americans?!?!
Stick to the crackers and cheese lady. Seems to be all you can manage!

ratherbkayaking said...

Good grief. I've never authored a cookbook and, in fact, vegetarian, but even I know to use a meat thermometer if I'm not sure it's been cooked enough to kill sammynella.

Thanks for the recap. Very, very clever.

Kate-go-away said...

How are these children going to be able to ever live in the real world? When Jon took them to the other pond I pictured the crew throwing in a bunch of fish off camera just before the kids put their poles in the water! My cousin has a well stocked pond but there isn't that much instant gratification! This along with the first class trips, box seats, gifts, private meet & greets and P-people flocking all around you is going to produce a bunch of demanding adults with a big sense of entitlement. YUCK! One of the biggest lessons for kids is, you can't always get what you want....

K8T LURKER said...

I think that as the children are getting older thay are at risk of becoming jaded and entitled. You can see it coming with the fishing scenes. If they don't get that instant gratification it isn't "fun" to them. Everything Kate does needs to be bigger, better, over the top. The children (through no fault of theirs) will beome more and more spoiled and the general viewing audiance will turn on them and lable them ingrates.

RVZ said...

Pass the popcorn..the misery is about to start..I love a good misery !

Beach Lover said...

Thank you for the recap. I couldn't stand watching the thing and wouldn't want to be counted in any way as a viewer of this American tragedy.

Question: Did Khate really say she had to "go fix the world" or were you being sarcastic. I mean, I can believe she would say that and really think it is true, but geez.

Doesn't it seem to you that those kids cry all the time over nothing? I have 5 children and of course there are tears, but that constant whining and crying seems excessive to me. Is it attention-seeking, do you think, or is it just that these kids don't know how else to communicate? They've seen Khate unravel probably every single day and they think this is the way you express any slight discomfort or what?

Anonymous said...

Geez the people at TLC are idiots, what a great idea for a show cuz the only thing people like more then seeing rich people excessivly spend money its listen to rich people b**h about how hard their life is while they spend all that money.

SeriouslySerious said...

Confession time. I broke down (it was late) and I watched part of this epi...er...train wreck.

When will K8ee get it? i.e. Having to carry (was it Aeden?) up to bed (poor K8...sob). Love the warm fuzzies in this scene. She is carrying him like a sack of potatoes! He is face forward and bending at the waist! NORMALLY, when carrying a sleeping child, their head goes on your shoulder (as in snuggling) and you hold them tight against you. What a (sob again) mother and child moment. Where was the sappy K8 music then?

Compare and Contrast J & K

K: does it big (building those memories, u know). K does not believe in keeping it simple...means she will have to interact with kids more...no jiffy pop...no snuggling (there's that word again) on the couch and watching movies...nope, spread out on the lawn...buy/rent a big, fancy pop corn machine with popcorn boxes and there you have it! I am all misty inside.

J: fishing and tin can phones...thanks J for giving them something to hold dear in their hearts...kudos.

Vanessa said...

Just curious, I wonder if those kids have ever been to a real movie theatre? Probably not, they'd just be swarmed with all the crazy paps/fans!

me too said...

Beach Lover said...


Question: Did Khate really say she had to "go fix the world" or were you being sarcastic. I mean, I can believe she would say that and really think it is true, but geez.


I think she meant fix the world for her family (kids). You know, make it better for them, help them through this time with the divorce and all.

Donna Day said...

As much as I love those kids and wish them well, they're growing up to become spoiled and rude. Kids are kids and manners aren't necessarily important to them and it's not their fault. I'm actually quite impressed w. Joel. He seems to be a calm kid compared to when he was younger. Alexis is still the same - humorous and charming. Leah is still "little and cute". The older twins...already seem to resent their parents - When kate was trying to set up a tent in earlier episodes, grill and set up the popcorn machine, the twins, esp. look disguisted. Collin seems more outgoing and Hannah still has kate's "i'm better than you attitude" but calm, like joel. Aaeden, it seems has changed. He seems to be a troublemaker now and just very out there.

I'm surprised at how simple moments like "fishing" aren't fun for them. Kids are curious about everything, esp w. things they've never done. I would've imagined they would've been excited w. fishing since it was something "new" but they sat there complaining and it wasn't "fun". Kate's got them spoiled into thinking that you need a pool, go on trips and fancy vacations. They need to realize that not everyone their age has the luxury of having a pool in their backyard or going on trips.

i wish them well and only time will tell what kind of people they will be. If not, there's no one else to blame but their parents.

me too said...

Donna Day said...
I'm surprised at how simple moments like "fishing" aren't fun for them. Kids are curious about everything, esp w. things they've never done. I would've imagined they would've been excited w. fishing since it was something "new" but they sat there complaining and it wasn't "fun". Kate's got them spoiled into thinking that you need a pool, go on trips and fancy vacations. They need to realize that not everyone their age has the luxury of having a pool in their backyard or going on trips.



I think even kids have differing personalities. I was never a kid who wanted to go fishing and when my family went on Sat. mornings I hated it. I was so happy when I got old enough to stay home when they went. lol.

And let's face it, I don't think many little girls are into walking through cow dung, wet fields, and being hot and sweaty.

I think I can safely say that even as a kid I would have preferred a pool to fishing.

Lin said...

Jon

When can you learn adults have to be careful who they associate with? A lot of adults are desperate for money. They will do anything like exploiting their children (wink), selling their friends, and so on. That is why most adults don't have real friends.

You keep walking around like a 15 year old boy wanting to hang out with people to kill time or be entertained. Then they all talk to tabloids to sell stories for money. This is the way adult world works and it will not change. The only thing you can change is to watch out who you make friends with and be very careful.

Anne in NY said...

Pony said...
BTW, as a single mom whose kids are now grown, I too am sick of hearing Kate whine about being a single mother. The day I see her doing laundry at midnight, trying to figure out whom she can ask to watch half the kids while she takes the other half to the emergency room, etc.
------------------

EXACTLY. I'll add one more from my own experience. How about seeing Single Mom Kate sort through the bills at the kitchen table, trying to decide which ones she can pay now and which ones she can put off for another week or two until the next paycheck comes in? How 'bout that scene, huh? Because this is the "most real reality show ever." Not gonna happen.

stopthemadness said...

So Kate is there most of the time (50%) and Jon some of the time with no rhyme or reason (50% as per their custody arrangement) and she feels sad when she leaves and she doesn't know if he feels that way.

How's the view from the high road?

Kate's afraid of heights and it shows...

How interesting that she wants her kids to dramatically watch her pack the car, what a friggen narcissist. Hoping that they will see how sad SHE is - never mind how that makes THEM feel to see mom work it for all this drama and try to get them upset. Although
(I didn't watch) I don't hear that anyone went running out to hug her and say "I don't want you to go away" - guess those moments are harder to script. For all we know they could have been high fiving each other in the house. I would be.

Paige (Final Clothes-Out) said...

Did Kate actually use the phrase "running the world"?

Barf.

stopthemadness said...

Scary thought: maybe all this fake scripted emotion IS a real day chez Gosselin. Maybe we don't see them just acting normal because there just isn't time for them to play and hang out. Or maybe they don't know how, because life for them is sitting around having someone tell you what to do and what to say so they can put it on tv. Their unscripted moments like hitting the dog with the bat don't seem all that warm and fuzzy. Maybe that is why Maddy was allowed to choose time with Grandma over fishing. WHo wants to see a real 9 year old girl's reaction to tramping thru cow poop and bugs to not catch a fish when she clearly doesn't want to be there.

In no way do I believe Joel's comment wasn't scripted. He's a daddy's boy and I think they want to minimize the fact that he clearly prefers his father.

Sissy said...

SafetyTrain said...
Awesome awesome recap. I didn't watch the show but I caught the commercial with Kate screeching about the popcorn (which, if I was planning to watch in the first place would have made me not want to). Right after that she told the kids that the popcorn would cost them $500+ each. Yeah, what a witty and appropriate joke coming from the mouth of a woman who forces her kids to support her. Like 5-year olds are going to get a joke about movie concession stand prices Kate. Shows yet again that she's just desperately playing to the cameras and not focusing on her kids at all.

9/16/2009 8:23 AM
-----------------------------

When she was doing her "come and get some popcorn" screeching, one of the little girls certainly was smiling in a "I can't believe what I am seeing" way. I think it was Hannah. So funny!

anotherthing... said...

loved the recap. '...like a drunk at a company Christmas party...' was pure gold. lol

this hgh road crap is just a joke at this point. ugh. puh-lease.

sooo.... ratings? anyone?

(and still no ratings from the last 'new' one? ....mmmmm curious....)

Pony said...

Vanessa said... "Just curious, I wonder if those kids have ever been to a real movie theatre? Probably not, they'd just be swarmed with all the crazy paps/fans!"

*****
I doubt it. And would you really want to be in the theater with them? They'd probably be climbing over the seats, talking out loud, while Kate ignored them so she could concentrate on watching the movie.

Anne in NY said...

"EXACTLY. I'll add one more from my own experience. How about seeing Single Mom Kate sort through the bills at the kitchen table, trying to decide which ones she can pay now and which ones she can put off for another week or two until the next paycheck comes in? How 'bout that scene, huh? Because this is the "most real reality show ever." Not gonna happen."

Good point. Or single mom Kate taking the credit card company's offer for a free balance transfer so she can have a payment-free month. Or being glad the kids like ramen noodles when it's near the end of the month and the child support check is late.

Tired of K8 said...

From reading the recap (not watching), it just seems to me that the TLC editors are not as pro-Kate as it appears. Does the activities and contrast between what Kate does and say vs. Jon, not just scream out that she is the most stupid idiot out there on the planet?

I am just wondering if someone in the editing room isn't rolling on the floor laughing while they string all of Kates' commentary together.

Ohio Buckeye said...

Liz123 said..."As a healthcare professional, shouldn't K8 know how to pronounce 'Salmonella'?"

Absolutely. K8 is an insult to nursing for MANY reasons. Her obvious ignorance is just the tip of the iceberg.

And, isn't it ironic that a professed 'germaphobe' is less concerned about feeding her kids under cooked poultry than the cleaning woman missing an obscure spot to dust, her kids going barefoot on a hotel carpet, or shoes worn inside the house? Huge leap o' logic here....

Chione said...

Are. You. Serious.

I'm no cook, but even I can grill/fry up a steak/bake something in the oven.

Seriously? She wasn't able to properly grill the chicken?! Newsflash, MARTYR!Kate, they make meat thermometers that you can use to TELL IF THE INSIDE OF YOUR MEAT IS COOKED. I guess these miracles of technology don't exist in your world or something.
Just...ugh. This woman is shameless.

Awesome recap as always :)
I'm actually kind of curious as to how the whole Jon part went...curious enough to try and find it on the internet someplace, if only to see them making pizza and catching fish.
I've always felt like Jon enjoyed being with the kids more than Kate, which I hope is genuine.
The fact that he won't step up and take them off the air really clashes with his 'caring dad' thing, which makes me suspicious.

Ohio Buckeye said...

My computer crashed while sending my last comment, so don't think it made it through, so if it did, and this is a duplicate, please ignore and sorry for the inconvenience.

K8 Cooks? "Love is in the Mix"? Give me a break. Bottled marinade, deviled eggs, and under grilled chicken - for THIS we need K8's advice on how to cook?

Might as well ask her for parenting tips, because her mothering skills are right up there with her culinary expertise.

And don't even get me started on her fashionista abilities with that hair, the store-bought boobs, tight tops, short skirts, and hooker heels.

But, hey, WOW, K8ie CAN change a screen this season. All by herself. Just like a big girl.

Truly a model for us all.

RickyBobby said...

Of course Jon spends more meaningful quality times with his kids. Even before the divorce, you can see Jon trying to spend time with the kids and let them have fun.

Kate's the one always sitting on her butt, and yelling at Jon.

For example, the beach trip, Jon was taking 2 kids to the water to jump the wave, while Kate sat on her butt yelling and screaming at Jon to "hold their hands", "watch the kids". etc etc.

When all she had to do was get off her butt, and help Jon with the kids, instead of just sitting there pretending to be pretty.

On another episode, Jon was rollerblading around his neighborhood with Cara, while Kate was yelling and screaming again and telling him to clean the garage to get ready for the spring.

While Mady was mocking Kate for being OCD (Kate kept rearranging the shoes in the shoe rack), Jon was trying to play jump rope with the kids.

Kate was sitting in the garage yelling at Jon to "clean" the garage. Of course, Jon fought back and said, "no". I'll clean later, right now I'm playing with the kids.

During all this yelling and screaming, Kate was just sitting on the chair yelling out orders.

Instead of cleaning the garage herself.

shel said...

Seriously? She wasn't able to properly grill the chicken?! Newsflash, MARTYR!Kate, they make meat thermometers that you can use to TELL IF THE INSIDE OF YOUR MEAT IS COOKED. I guess these miracles of technology don't exist in your world or something.
Just...ugh. This woman is shameless.

______________
how dare you suggest the perfect cook Kate would need to use meet theaometer. that would be so below her.

Ohio Buckeye said...

RickyBobby said...
****************************
Boy, do I agree!

A) Season after season, matter what Jon said or did, she criticized, demeaned, and complained. He never did or said ANYTHING right according to her. Watching this dynamic epi after epi got very old, which is the biggest reason I am no longer a viewer. Ever.

B) She rarely if ever actually interacted with the kids either one on one or as a group. Mostly she sat with her fanny firmly planted in that classy white plastic chair of hers.

Even when the script called for an activity with the kids, like painting pottery, K8 'had' to avert her eyes from 'the mess' and THEN make fun of the items her kids made that day(?!)

The woman has no joy. EVER.

If she loooovveeess and misses and enjoys her kids so much, she certainly has an odd way of showing it.

K8 is all about K8. She is an attention addict. That's JMO.

RandomThoughts said...

Has she never heard of cutting one of the thicker pieces of chicken open at its fattest part to see if it's cooked all the way through? True, temperature is the BEST way, but you really CAN tell if chicken is cooked thoroughly.

Tuesday said...

Seriously, what idiotic publishing company would attach their name to a COOKBOOK written by this fraud? Just a heads up Jon, don't eat anything left in the fridge after she leaves. Great recap!

Kat_momof3 said...

I'm no Jon fan AT ALL... especially with all this drama he has going on... but Kate really has always gotten on my nerves. Instead of playing with her children, interacting with her children, she chooses things she doesn't have to do.

Cooking the meal - HELLO! (as Kate has said to Jon)... why not set up the chicken marinating (covered of course) and prepare the salads (pasta, etc.) and deviled eggs THE NIGHT BEFORE... GASP... LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE DO!!

My grandmother, my mother in law... NEVER single mothers, but I guarantee you they always did this.

Heck, before thanksgiving, I make the big seven layer salad, deviled eggs, basically anything that can be refrigerated over night and taste the same, and do as much of the prep as I can THE NIGHT BEFORE while my older two (for Kate this would be the twins) shower, all 3 brush their teeth (they come in and show me the teeth so I can check them), and get all ready for bed.

I wash my hands, get them in bed, then I come back and finish doing that.

It makes it far less time consuming.

I mean, geez, who doesn't let the chicken sit in the marinade longer than that?

Second, no way would I trust 8 kids watched by ONE adult unless said ONE adult was a trained Lifeguard, when in a pool... even if there was no deep end.

And no way would I have them jumping off the board or in the deep water until they could do so as well as they would have to in order to go there at a public pool.

Kids can drown too easily and this is not a time to be calm and easy.

This is the time for swimsuits with built-in foam, daily swim lessons, and rules.

The kids would have been just as happy riding their bikes or playing in the yard until both Mom and babysitter (or a babysitter who knows basic lifeguard skills and lifesaving skills (mouth to mouth, cpr)) were able to supervise.

Jon seems to be better at simple, yet safety-conscious activities.

Fishing was definitely full of risks (the water, the hooks, the poles, the sharp fins on fish, but he was calm yet firm about setting boundaries.


I will speculate that perhaps the two grills are because they are divorcing and now everything has to be either HIS or HERS... not OURS... but who knows.

And I swear, while I even use disposable plates and flatware sometimes (though the flatware gets washed and reused until it falls apart), I'm SICK TO DEATH of these children only eating off of paper.

It takes way more energy and expense recycling all those disposable plates and utensils than it would to simply (GASP AGAIN) get some good (heck, even plastic ones from the dollar store) plates and metal flatware.

And I am SICK of seeing the tups forced to drink (not that straws aren't fun and I'm sure they enjoy the straw part) drinking from cups with lids.

If all 3 of my kids (even my oldest with some mild special needs) has managed an open lid cup by age 4 with every meal, then surely these clearly bright children can be trusted with such freedom.

Lucia said...

The ratings must be even lower. They didn't even dare to mention. Usually they would brag about it, even when it's low, they tell you it's pretty good for a cable show. They stopped bragging since the episode two weeks ago because it was 1.9 mill, that's low for a cable show paying for a big production crew, maintaining the house, bodyguard, nanny, assistant, babysitter, and the greedy TV mom.

Tami said...

Heck, before thanksgiving, I make the big seven layer salad, deviled eggs, basically anything that can be refrigerated over night and taste the same, and do as much of the prep as I can THE NIGHT BEFORE while my older two (for Kate this would be the twins) shower, all 3 brush their teeth (they come in and show me the teeth so I can check them), and get all ready for bed.

*******
Oh but she is so organized! Actually, an organized person would do all these things. Heck, if I ever have to prepare lots of food I certainly do not attempt to to it with my kids running around. I'll do it at night like you said and refrigerate it!

Sarah said...

Was Mady only shown when she was recycling or was she shown more with Kate? Jon said she was with Grandma, but maybe she threw a fit about being filmed. Mady has always seemed like the most outspoken. I wouldn't put it past her to refuse or make it completely difficult to film.

anotherthing.... said...

i know its long, but hear me out... what do you guys think?:

my idea (from the recap, didnt watch): after seeing the raw footage of 'katezilla' being her usual nasty, bit**y, narcissitic, even abusive self, TLC has decided to air a 'connect the dots' for viewers....

and what i mean is:

* they have shown her being a lousy (to put it mildly) cook
-katezilla has a cookbook coming out....

*showing her with a siter
-debunking the tired 'single mother' act

*airing her 'i hate leaving speach'
-the week she makes very public rounds of her stupid 'appearances'

* the 'high road' crap she spews (if i have o hear that one more time...)
- her blaming/criticizing jon peppered into her couch interviews

....now maybe its just me, but all of this is VERY obviously a contridiction... a visible lie.

is TLC 'sticking it to her'???? tired of her 'behind the scenes' crap????

giving us every opportunity to connect the dots and see the ugly, lying, nasty side of this monster???

is it just me????????

big meanie said...

You are right about Kate having no joy. She is such a buzzkill when it comes to her kids and more concerned with the stupidest minutia. No wonder Jon's acting out; he's finally free. The kids should have interesting college years. Hope they all find one that costs less than $10,000 for all 4 years.

melissa said...

Thanks for the recap. I just have to say I am SO incredibly glad this episode has come and gone. Every time I would see a promo for this episode and hear Kate say "come and get your popcorn" in the most abominable voice every to hit the airwaves, it would be just as if someone slammed an ice pick into my ear and straight into my brain!

stopthemadness said...

How many kids drown every year because mom was just in the kitchen answering the phone or just taking the baby in to change her diaper, and someone slipped under water? In Houston it's about 6. 8 kids many of whom do not swim need to have 2 adults there and they need swimming lessons and water safety lessons as anyone with a pool would do for their young kids, to keep them safe and give them that extra 20 seconds for mom or whoever to get to them if they get tired. Do they even know what to do if they get tired or cramp, or some other kid jumps on their head while they are in the water?
She is too stupid to be believed, terrified of the kids walking on the hotel floor but allowing them on ATVs and in the pool without the proper safety precautions. She is like a hillbilly who got a bunch of money and has no class or idea how to act in better surroundings or with rich folk things like the cement pond, (as the Beverly Hillbillies used to call their pool).
She has no idea what to do or how to behave with any of the things and people she's been bleesed with. IT's funny on the Beverly Hills. In real life with real kids, not so much.

stopthemadness said...

And yet this broad who isn't smart enough to cut into a piece of grilled chicken, press it and see if the juice runs clear, is going to publish a COOK BOOK? I think a collection of recipes more likely. The idea of her as a real cook is ridiculous. My EIGHT year old knows how to check if chickens and burgers are done, mainly because their dad showed my kids how to do this rather than locking them in the basement or shovelling them into the pool while he grilled. They never seem to do any hands on training with these kids. They were still ahving their bottoms wiped for them when they moved into the orphanage - still with the sippy cups - I've never seen them helping in the kitchen other than the time Mady and Cara played mommy and mommy gave them a recipe to make then came in and took over doing it because to allow them to practice and fumble would take too long. These kids are going to grow up not able to get out of their own way.
One thing I loved about doing a home daycare when my first was young, was the time I got to spend with her teaching her life skills which means a certain amount of spills and messes. Kate HAS TIME if she would take it, to put one of the kids, and not always a GIRL, up on a low stool in the kitchen to help mix, measure, stir and chop. She chooses to be out there pimping her kids and herself for yet another $$$ opportunity meanwhile the 5 1/2 year olds struggle for the skills to enter kindergarten. I guess if you call getting free vacations "culturizing" then it makes it okay - they may not be able to write their names with a pencil, or count to 30 but they have been on a flying machine (where they got to see mom throw a huge fit because she's an @sshole).

Im_in_PR said...

Poll at New York Daily News: Should Kate get her own talk show?

astriapage said...

Please bear with me-I have had major heart surgery, and fighting chronic illness, can't express myself as well as I would like to!

At the beginning of this episode, I found myself so frustrated because of all of Kate's airtime. They were not showing the kids, and to top it off we got to hear all of her whining, which by the way is so fake! I wish this chick really had something to cry about.
Why don't they get that we tune in to see the kids?

It was very refreshing though to see them fishing at the pond with Jon. That is one of my favorite childhood memories of times spent with my father. I was rooting for them that they would be able to catch something. They did and it truly seemed to make them all happy. I really can't recall them being that happy at one of Kate's major orchestrated events. I am sure it made them feel good at accomplishing something, even if they did have help.

Natalie said...

To the person who wondered about the movie theatre...

The answer is NO, they've never gone. The first "movie night" episode in the basement, Jon mentioned not being able to go to the theatre because how many they were (and hinting to the kids behaviour). He also said it would cost "over $100" for one movie. Which was a RIDICULOUS amount. I'm sure that's not so ridculous anymore, but at this point they don't do normal/not publicised things with thier kids so that point is moot anyways.

rural mom said...

I expect the next tearful confessional interview coming from Kate is where she announces her new talk show in one breathe and in the other, sob, says it is time her kids got off tv, she is doing this for them, she will be the only Gosselin on tv, she is taking them out of that drafty old farmhouse in Pennsylvania and plunking them down in a nice warm New York condo (with the nannies of course) because that is what they asked her to do, everything she does is for them, it is all for the kids... and catch me live at this time on this channel, guffaw/shriek.

TexasHere said...

No offense but I couldn't even finish reading the recap b/c the show sounded so dang boring! But the parts which I read was extremely funny and very well written, so compliments to the chef :)

This has got to be one of the most boring shows ever of all time. I haven't watch in over a year, but check in here now and then out of plain old curiosity, and I have to say, it has never gotten better.

I'm sorry for those writers who have to watch the show so that some of us can "be awares" through your recaps. TLC should be paying you for doing them a service - your recaps are soooooo much better than the actual show. Isn't that pathetic TLC????

TexasHere said...

RickyBobby said:

Kate was sitting in the garage yelling at Jon to "clean" the garage. Of course, Jon fought back and said, "no". I'll clean later, right now I'm playing with the kids.

During all this yelling and screaming, Kate was just sitting on the chair yelling out orders.

Instead of cleaning the garage herself.

-------------

Don't you know? She couldn't get up and clean the garage herself because she was so EXHAUSTED. Give her a break - she was EXHAUSTED. The poor woman has 8 kids - she is EXHAUSTED. Sometimes I wish she would just tatoo that word across her breasts - it would save her the effort to actually say it. I mean, that's where people look at her these days, right? Or maybe she should have the word EXHAUSTED tatooed across her hiney....

Who is lying? said...

That babysitter said Jon had a vasectomy after the sextuplets were born. It's either the babysitter is lying or Kate is lying.

According to Kate, she couldn't get pregnant at all without fertility treatment . So why would Jon get a vasectomy right after the sextuplets were born??? She couldn't even get pregnant. It's not necessary, right?

It's either the babysitter is lying or Kate is lying about the fertility treatment was absolutely necessary because she had a condition and couldn't get pregnant.

pressured cooker said...

Seriously? She wasn't able to properly grill the chicken?! Newsflash, MARTYR!Kate, they make meat thermometers that you can use to TELL IF THE INSIDE OF YOUR MEAT IS COOKED. I guess these miracles of technology don't exist in your world or something.
Just...ugh. This woman is shameless.
*************

TLC is still working on the product placement deal for a meat thermometer.

Sweetp said...

Someone catch me up to speed this week.... Has Jon been at the house most of the time this week or just some of the time this week?????

stopthemadness said...

Hopefully the local hospital will treat the children for free, from the sammonilla?? Otherwise it's the laundry room floor for you! Or possibly the driveway pavement. Even easier to hose the mess off into the grass and added bonus that way, in that the paps can catch every second of heaving and groaning and all the ministrations of the exhausted mother nursing her darlings, with TLC - and a barf bucket.

And dont vomit on your comfort object you've had since infancy otherwise it will be thrown out as mommy is just TOO busy to wash it, bless her single parent heart.

Sissy said...

how dare you suggest the perfect cook Kate would need to use meet theaometer. that would be so below her.

9/16/2009 7:24 PM
//////////////////////////////

She has probably never heard of a meat thermometor, therefore she surely would not know how to use one. You have to actually do the cooking to know about the tools that are available. Grapes and yogurt don't require any tools.

Ohio Buckeye said...

Sissy said....
*********************************

Yeah, and anyone remember the epi when K8 screwed up Jon's Korean recipe, and, rather than take responsibility for it (muchless apologize!), her nasty comment was, "REAL cooks don't NEED recipes".

I guess what she meant was that REAL cooks buy a bottle of marinade, toss raw meat on a grill for a couple minutes, and voila! Dinner's ready! No recipe required!

Turn to pg 32 of "Love is in the Mix" for "K8's Special Salmonella Chicken" - Mmmm, mmmm, good! Seconds, anyone?

Anonymous said...

Fostersmom....You should be sitting on the couch with the martyr music...YOU had to endure closely and carefully watching the whole dog gone episode!

When I saw the popcorn hat promo..and she said "I came up with the idea of watching a movie outside". Nobel Prize! My she is of the "intelligensia" isnt she?

All the little tidbit promos we see show a smiling happy mommy. BALONEY!!

Does she think we have short memories and "forgot" how she really is? We know you Kate. We know you.

shesaidwhat? said...

If I recall correctly, Jon stated that he 'was unable to have more children' in a response to a question asked about having more kids during his Penn State speaking engagement.
After reading the response of 'not able to have more children' I assumed Jon was referring to having a vasectomy. I found it odd that J & K would agree to such a permanent method of birth control considering Kate's infatuation with 'wanting to know what it was like to have just ONE more' . If the probablity of Kate conceiving is nill to none but both were open to the option of 'having one more' (both made claim they had considered adopting a Korean baby) why not just put the outcome of the 'one more' in 'God's hands' and if a natural conception occurs consider it a 'gift that they always wanted'. IMO, Jon got the vasectomy to prevent a 'fool me once shame on you, fool me twice (thrice) shame on me'.

anotherthing... said...

right now on that poll linked above:

should kate get her own show?
60% have voted NO!

(only because there was no 'HE**-NO-shes-aweful-and-has-nothing-of-any-benefit-to-offer-society-and-must-go-the-F-away' button.)

AnneMarie said...

Say it ain't so PAULA !
========
Kate is supposedly off filming the pilot for her new TV series this weekend - co starrring Paula Deen. If it's true, it all goes out in the trash, and I'll scratch another show off my list, as well as a few more product _ HELLO SMITHFIELD HAMS !
=========
ROL.
Kate is teaming up with Paula Deen, the Southern cooking expert for a show that is planned to have a mix of advice, health and beauty tips and celebrity gossip.

fidosmommy said...

K8 Cooks? "Love is in the Mix"? Give me a break. Bottled marinade, deviled eggs, and under grilled chicken - for THIS we need K8's advice on how to cook?

******

She's not making edible food, she's making MEMORIES, remember?
Just what the kids want to remember, Mom yelling at everyone while she makes Old Grandma's soup,
Mom ridiculing their father while
he's making a Korean meal, and getting handed a yogurt cup and told not to spill it.

Last I heard, one of Kate's "recipes" included making
a turkey sandwich. 2 slices of bread, turkey slices, tomato slice, lettuce, cut it diagonally.

Wouldn't YOU pay a bundle for that?

Maybe she can jazz it up with a recipe for popcorn, ya think?

Paul Deen is lame too said...

Paula teaming up with Kate to make a TV show? I always knew Paula is a phony. Her "southern charm" didn't fool me. Puke.

AS IF Paula cares about morals. She is jumping the bandwagon to exploit the 8 children and riding on their coattail. Southern cook wants to be Oprah. Give me a freaking break. Now all the housewives who have no talent want to be Oprah.

Paula Deen is lame too said...

If I cooked like Paula Deen, I would get a heart attack and die young. Is she going to cook healthy now? PLEASE! Just look at yourself, Paula. Fat lady wants to exploit children to get more money and fortune.

Email Paula to tell her she shouldn't do the show with Kate.
http://www.pauladeen.com/contact

fidosmommy said...

Excuse me, but could we keep the physique of individuals out of it?
Paula's weight, average or not average, has nothing to do with her ability to do what she does.

If Paula does a show with just Kate and the kids are in school, I have to ask how this helps exploit children? Kate would be free to talk about her children (non-private moments, of course) on any show just like anyone else is free to talk about her children.

I personally think Paula already has enough shows, and with her restaurant and her associated businesses, I'd say she's got her hands full without having to deal with Kate Gosselin. Paula's not
my go-to cook for recipes, frankly,
but I don't see her show as being a forum for child exploitation.

Anonymouse said...

Kate is giving advise on cooking and is even going to write a cookbook herself?

The same person that told Jon real cook don't use recipes?

So what will her cookbook include if you don't need recipes?

I bet her cookbook will be about building brand and how to start from scratch.

Lower Heidelberg Neighbor said...

I only saw a few minutes of the show but it was horrible, once again, how she based Jon. The kids are going to see all this one day.

She basically sat on the coach and announced that she was running the house herself....she had to come back home and put the whole house together and make everthing right that Jon messed up during his time with the kids and then she STILL needed to make memories....

Making memories...the kids are going to have a whole huge collection of tabloid memories and tape of Mommy and Daddy fighting...horrible memories...so sad for those kids.

LovetheKidsHateKate said...

Ah it's so nice to see a site that is anti-kate. It's refreshing. I post on a quite popular gosselin site and it's got so Kate fanatic that I say one thing against her and they attack like hyenas.

Wonderful recap! I loved how innocently happy the kids were with Jon fishing at the pond and you reflected that perfectly.
Although Jon isn't the greatest you can tell that he genuinely loves those kids and they love him dearly.

Ohio Buckeye said...

Fido'sMommy: always enjoy your comments, BTW..................

Yes, 'making memories'. If K8 were a smart woman, the LAST thing she'd do is document her ongoing behavior on DVD's for all (including her poor kids) to see.

She is blind to the fact that her behavior really ought to be one of her biggest secrets...between her and her psych counsellor.

emmasmommy said...

Great recap...I was laughing pretty hard at the part......Who knows, maybe sammonella doesn’t run the risk of severe illness like salmonella does. .......too freakin hillarious.

It does not surprise me one bit that she asked the kids to watch her as she leaves from the window. It is to imagine. But I have to ask, what MOTHER does that. A real MOTHER always has their kids best interest at heart and especially when divorce is an issue. OMG! It is freakin frustrating. Women like her gives us a bad name.

I did not watch the View so I do not know how she performed. But I did read the comments on Dlisted and I have a suspicion that it was not memorable.

She goes on these shows stating that she will take the high road. Yeah OK!!!!!!That is her publicist talking. it is so she can get a $$$$$$$$$ for an exclusive interview with Diane Sawyer or Barbara Walters or something like that. That will happen right before her new show.

SICK OF HER

rural mom said...

I have a 4 year old and it just kills me imagining her bringing brought up in a Gosselin household. Neither parent can be in the house with the kids at the same time. So as much as these kids may need mommy and daddy, sorry, you have to wait your days. Imagine the upheaval, they never know one day to the next which nanny will be with them, most don't work out, most are never seen again. They have no family they can rely on, Kate made sure anybody who refused to sign the non disclosure got the boot. Imagine being in the house when Kate tried to get in that night, they stuck with a stoned Jon and his partying babe and her baby, and a freaked out Kate on the outside. The reports coming out of that household are very troubling. Proof these kids have zero security, zero comfort, zero safety. I bet they all cry themselves to sleep and cling to their parents when they see them and beg them not to leave. I bet they long for their freedom and the days when they had a family in tact and had pancake mornings (if that even existed). Kate thinks as long as she keeps the toys and treats and comfort items coming they don't need her there. Jon thinks as long as he gets to see them as much as he likes, they are doing fine. The courts should appoint both parents to raise these children, to live in the same neighbourhood, to have no nannies or hired help, get get back into the business of loving, caring, nuturing, protecting and raising their children. Something the Gosselins feel they are entitled to hire someone else to take care of.

Tired of K8 said...

This show and last weeks show still doesn't have published ratings correct?

Crate Kate said...

The fact that Kate let's TLC film her in all her ugliness, wants it to continue, and thinks she is somehow inspirational or witty shows how she lacks self-awareness. Imagine the unedited crap TLC must have. And her performance on the View proves that she is not ad lobbing on that show on the couch or in voiceovers. So all that interviewing herself, can-do Kate, making memories bull is probably scripted. Kate looks like such an ass that I wonder if some evil genius in the editing room at TLC actually hates her. (Hope this post doesn't get anyone fired).

Oh and asking the kids to watch you pack up cheap suitcases into your car as you leave the orphanage was vintage Kate. Let's try to make a situation tragic that doesn't have to be. Loved the sound effects of those clunky hooker heels. I'll bet the kids were glad to see her go.

livnluv said...

AnneMarie said...
Say it ain't so PAULA !
========
Kate is supposedly off filming the pilot for her new TV series this weekend - co starrring Paula Deen. If it's true, it all goes out in the trash, and I'll scratch another show off my list, as well as a few more product _ HELLO SMITHFIELD HAMS !
=========
ROL.
Kate is teaming up with Paula Deen, the Southern cooking expert for a show that is planned to have a mix of advice, health and beauty tips and celebrity gossip.
---------------------

"...and celebrity gossip."

Would that be kate talking about kate? I wouldn't think a person who always takes the high road would stoop to gossiping.

franky said...

Emmasmommy, are you from Nova Scotia?..LOL..I felt like I was listening to me friend reading your post..and ..yup, you hit the nail head on

junebug said...

Only saw the commercial but, with that thing on her head she is looking more and more like the muppets everyday.

junebug said...

All I have to say is Paula Dean has her work cut out for her.

More lies said...

Regarding letting her children watch the DVD's of her behavior, Kate has that covered. I've seen several re-runs and her nasty behavior, particularly towards Jon, has been cut out or I guess you'd say edited. So I was thinking the children will never know. But wait a minute! They have lived it! Too little, too late Kate.

TLC is for losers said...

The show should be called "How Not To Raise Your Children".

I am appalled sometimes the kids talk to Jon in a very disrespectful way. They learn that from their mother, who else. I believe they do that more often than what those episodes show you because the editing has to show the good side of the children.

anotherthing said...

still no ratings, huh?

...for the past 2 shows???

hmmm....

hey TLC, you picked an interesting time to follow the whole "if you cant say something nice... dont say anything at all" thing...

johnsmom said...

If anything decent comes from this mess of a family it is that at least the kids are getting out and doing something. The fishing, movies on the lawn, cookouts, traveling etc., better than sitting in that house listening to their parents argue on camera constantly!
Loved the Chicken-a-la-gag you served your entire family.........look forward to your cookbook KATE!!

Yipes said...

Finally saw and heard The Screech on YouTube. Oh. My. Word. My ears are bleeding and eyelids simply disintegrated. I say let Kate do a talk show and give her creative control. This will blow up faster than her rear end has since the bikini photos were taken. What an ass she is.

Cindy said...

They won't publish the ratings until the Kate Gosselin Bubble bursts just like dot com crash.

They will hold their ground as long as possible after her filming a pilot show this weekend and getting picked up by the national TV network (they hope). TLC staffers are hoping that when Kate has a talk show on national TV, the ratings of her TLC show will improve. They wish.

fidosmommy said...

Anonymouse said...
Kate is giving advise on cooking and is even going to write a cookbook herself?

The same person that told Jon real cook don't use recipes?

So what will her cookbook include if you don't need recipes?

*****

There was a sampling once of some of the recipes Kate was planning to include in her cookbook. It was on this blog or on Amazon when they were selling the book.

It included (seriously) a meat sandwich - I think it was turkey -
with lettuce and tomato, cut on a diagonal. It included Monkey Munch
- also called Puppy Chow - the stuff she and the kids made one day when she didn't have enough powdered sugar on hand. It included hummus, which is essentially chickpeas, roasted whatever you want to put into it and some salt and served on pita bread or pita chips.

So yeah, no recipes needed, especially if you have a box of
Crispix Cereal or some other kind of off-the-shelf box or can to snag the recipes already on the label.

A non-recipe cookbook. Gee, I'll buy 8 or 10 and hand them out at Christmas gifts. I promise not to take them back when you don't want them anymore! ;-)

ratings are declining rapidly said...

Ummm....No ratings for 2 weeks? Imagine that. That couldn't possibly mean the show is dying off now could it???? hahahaha

Take that to bed Eileen O'neil

buh bye kate said...

rural mom said...

I expect the next tearful confessional interview coming from Kate is where she announces her new talk show in one breathe and in the other, sob, says it is time her kids got off tv, she is doing this for them, she will be the only Gosselin on tv, she is taking them out of that drafty old farmhouse in Pennsylvania and plunking them down in a nice warm New York condo (with the nannies of course) because that is what they asked her to do, everything she does is for them, it is all for the kids... and catch me live at this time on this channel, guffaw/shriek.
**************

I was thinking that very same thought. From reading the recaps (I don't watch) it sure sounds like Kate is sure of her own tv show and she doesn't care about reality tv anymore. Besides, there are enough Baby Mama's out there to believe her no matter if the truth reached out and slapped them silly.

bigstepforward said...

Looks like the screech is back. For next monday, she's playing with the kids and has a "aldergator" as Lexis would say it and K8 is holding onto the gator and screeches out, "I'm hungry" and a bunch of other nonsense.

This is the new and improved K8. She is, after 10 years, finally playing with the kids at least.

This is a huge step for Kate.

stopthemadness said...

I'm starting to get it. The regular shots in the show of her being a bitch, are the realest reality ever and the ones where she puts a popcorn box on her head and screeches, are her - ACTING. Because she's an actress.

I'm sure the thought of this level of professional competition keeps Meryl Streep up at night.

No eat cupcakes said...

Please don't tell me Kate is still hellbent on writing that cookbook.
"No eat cupcakes" here we come.

Geri said...

stopthemadness said...
I'm starting to get it. The regular shots in the show of her being a bitch, are the realest reality ever and the ones where she puts a popcorn box on her head and screeches, are her - ACTING. Because she's an actress.

I'm sure the thought of this level of professional competition keeps Meryl Streep up at night.

****

I spit coffee all over my keyboard over that one LOL very good.

ganana said...

TLC, do you have no shame, running this nightmare week after week?

Midwest Mom said...

The Screech Video "Come & Get Your Popcorn" was properly made fun of on The Soup last night !!!

cwood said...

It's obvious that the kids enjoy their time with Kate more than Jon.