It may be a subjective blog, but it's Are Blog!

Here's the tough thing about comments written to a blog -- they can't actually be edited, even by the board administrators. So when we have a comment submitted for publication, there are two buttons to click: Publish and Reject -- there is no Edit button.

Usually, after reading the comment carefully, it is an easy choice and we click the button and move on. But there are times when more consideration is needed because a post isn't all that straightforward. Is the comment interesting, well-articulated, reasonably civil, and relevant to the discussion? Great! But what if in the midst of all that's right, there is something wrong? Ranting that makes this blog look like the work of nutjobs or flakes? Insulting and negative words aimed at the Gosselin children? Name-calling of Jon, Kate, or those whose opinions differ from the person who wrote the post?

If there were a way to publish the great parts of the post while leaving out the clutter, we just might do that. But we can't, so we have to decide if we want to reject it and throw the baby out with the bathwater, or publish it anyway and risk discrediting ourselves and what we say we are working toward.

In the interest of keeping our momentum going in the right direction, we are going to be less likely to publish comments that resort to slurs against the Gosselin children, and comments that resort to name-calling to make a point. Same goes for comments that are just hostile or condescending in tone. Swearing is fine, we're all adults and can handle it -- but if all you have to bring to the table is the spice without the meat, we're not going to serve it.

P.S. You may also want to read the first entry in the FAQ section of our sidebar, "Why didn't my comment ever show up? Where did it go?". If you still aren't sure why your comment(s) were rejected, please email me at serenaleighbell@yahoo.com for clarification.

38 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am confused. Did you mean OUR blog? Not to be nitpicky, just curious.

Grammier said...

anonymous, think about what Kate says at the beginning of the show. "It may be a crazy life, but it's ARE life." Sure, she means our, but she says "are." This is "ARE" blog.

Anonymous said...

I really don't know how blogs are set up--I'm new to this. But wouldn't it be possible to copy and paste a comment to a Word or Text document, do your editing there, then post it? Just curious how this works.....

mamamitch said...

That's what she meant - it is a little joke on the way Kate says, "it's ARE life" in the show's intro.

Anonymous said...

"ARE" you making fun of the show?

Serena said...

I really don't know how blogs are set up--I'm new to this. But wouldn't it be possible to copy and paste a comment to a Word or Text document, do your editing there, then post it? Just curious how this works.....

I've actually done that a couple of times; once when someone tried to post the Gosselin home address, and another time when a link was posted that was inappropriate.

When doing that, you also have to remember the handle the author used and which blog entry the comment was supposed to be published with... all in all a tedious and time-consuming effort.

So technically, yes, it can be done that way. However with thousands of visitors posting hundreds of comments per day, it would take more manpower than we have to do that and still get comments published in a timely manner.

Plus, it would open the can of worms that we are editing other people's words, which is not something we're interested in doing.

Oh, and yes! The title of this entry was my lame attempt to poke fun at Kate's declaration of "It's OUR life!", pronouncing o-u-r as if it is spelled a-r-e. It's a central Pennsylvania accent, but kind of annoying every time I hear it.

Anonymous said...

It's not just an central PA thing but also a SE PA thing. I grew up outside of Philly saying ARE for OUR. The Philly/PA accent has some interesting quirks, that's for sure.

FIONA said...

Serena,

Bravo! I know that some of my own comments have not shown up and I have to go back and think, how could I have written that better, etc...I myself am a passionate poster. But in the interest of keeping the standards of this site high, I think what you are doing is correct. And yea, copying and pasting, too much work. I think we know when we cross the line...I think....but that is what you are for.

Thanks for all your hard work!

Anonymous said...

Haha!! That's funny. I have never noticed that she said "are" instead of our. You guys are good. :)

moi said...

It's not just an central PA thing but also a SE PA thing. I grew up outside of Philly saying ARE for OUR. The Philly/PA accent has some interesting quirks, that's for sure.

I'm from South Jersey and that's how we say it too, although I am much more conscious of it now, hearing Kate say it incorrectly every week (How interesting that she is constantly correcting JON's speech, though!)

Anonymous said...

Moi, I don't think it's incorrect. It's an accent.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, it's just an accent.

Anonymous said...

that sounds good. just please don't turn into twop nazi mods ;)

Anonymous said...

Oh, another thing - if possible, could you do kind of a "main" topic with the show description like that tups turn 4 so there's a main area to discuss the week's show specifically? does that even make sense? LOL

Teresa said...

mamamitch said...
That's what she meant - it is a little joke on the way Kate says, "it's ARE life" in the show's intro.

I think it's a regional thing. I grew up in northeast Ohio and OUR was pronounced ARE. Of course I also said WORSH for WASH. lol I now live in the Upper Midweat and had to retrain myself because the kept correcting me. lol

Serena said...

Oh, another thing - if possible, could you do kind of a "main" topic with the show description like that tups turn 4 so there's a main area to discuss the week's show specifically? does that even make sense?

That makes perfect sense and it's an excellent idea -- we'll work on that and you can check back later tonight.

Anonymous said...

"It's not just an central PA thing but also a SE PA thing. I grew up outside of Philly saying ARE for OUR. The Philly/PA accent has some interesting quirks, that's for sure."


You know I never noticed that. But that's probably because I'm from good ole Berks County myself. Former home of the Gosselins. Those crazy PA dutch.....I'm looking at you Kate.

miemic said...

It's good to know that negative comments regarding the kiddos are off-topic. That's the one thing that really stung to read.

Anonymous said...

This subject title just cracked me up! I am ALWAYS making fun of the "it's ARE life" thing. My Boyfriend is an English teacher and gets a kick out of it as well. It has become a bit of an "inside joke" for us, because no one else we know (in person) watches the show. It's nice to know someone else noticed the error and can laugh about it with us!

Hannah said...

I live in California and we pronounce "our" as "are" too. I think it's a fairly common pronunciation of the word.

adri said...

I pronounce "our" as "are" too. I've heard others do it, but not sure if it's a regional thing (I'm from northern Minnesoooooda.)

minxie said...

LOL at "Are". Kate sees herself as the expert on (among other things) grammar, speech, syntax and yet some of her sentences are completely mangled and sound incredibly stilted.

I am happy to find this blog because I, too, was banned from the J & K TWOP thread--I'm not even sure why! It was fine because I'm too old to deal with the scolding they dished out over there.

Darcy said...

I pronounce "our" as "are" too. I've heard others do it, but not sure if it's a regional thing (I'm from northern Minnesoooooda.)

Adri-
I do the same thing and I'm ALSO from Northern MN.

Anonymous said...

The comments that bother me most are ones where people diagnose Kate (or anyone) with mental disorders. Speculations about how Kate "seems" like she has this disorder or listing the characteristics she exhibits of a specific disorder are fine but unless you are a licensed professional an absolute diagnosis is misleading. Even if you are a professional I doubt you would diagnoses any mental disorder without meeting the client in person because that is a strict standard under most ethical guidelines.

Anonymous said...

It always bugs me a little bit when people make fun of pronunciation. I get annoyed at grammar, but more often than not even the grammar issues are a dialect issue (I leave out the "to be" in a lot of situations, because we have a variation of the Pittsburgh dialect). Pronunciation due to accent is never "wrong," so "are" for "our" doesn't bother me.

Serena said...

The comments that bother me most are ones where people diagnose Kate (or anyone) with mental disorders.

Meh. Not me. I don't think anyone mistakes the speculation of strangers on the internet for actual diagnoses.

But I will say that if it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck...

Anyone who has been raised by a narcissist can spot one a mile away, and I personally agree with that label for Kate 100%.

Sinclair said...

What runs me crazy is her correcting Jon over everything, then her using "I" instead of "me".
For example: "Mady gave Jon and I a card."
She says stuff like that all the time.

Type (little) a said...

You can edit comments in Wordpress without deleting the whole thing.

I transferred my blogger blog over about 2 years ago and didn't lose even a single comment.

moi said...

Anyone who has been raised by a narcissist can spot one a mile away, and I personally agree with that label for Kate 100%.

Exactly. I used to try to say this on TWoP but of course was suspended/warned for "talking about myself instead of the show." Those of us with the experience know how damaging behavior like Kate's is, how serious the problem is.

Serena said...

I transferred my blogger blog over about 2 years ago and didn't lose even a single comment.

We you able to put a redirect on to your blogger blog so that people could find your wordpress blog without knowing it had been moved?

Type (little) a said...


We you able to put a redirect on to your blogger blog so that people could find your wordpress blog without knowing it had been moved?


No, but my husband (who works in IT) assures me a re-direct is easy. I just slapped up a "i've moved" post, and then added the new link to my blogger profile.

I'm sure someone else can speak more intelligently than I about re-directs though.

Anonymous said...

What runs me crazy is her correcting Jon over everything, then her using "I" instead of "me".

Yeah, it is ironic that she corrects him constantly, since her grammar and vocabulary is actually far worse than his. Does anyone remember "sickening sweet" and "seething in butter"?

Anonymous said...

Yeah, it is ironic that she corrects him constantly, since her grammar and vocabulary is actually far worse than his. Does anyone remember "sickening sweet" and "seething in butter"?

"Sickening sweet" is a saying fairly common in central PA. Perhaps it has roots in the PA Dutch??? Not sure. I believe it basically means the food that is referenced contains so much sugar that it can be overly sweet and thus sickening.

According to Webster, one of the definitions for the word seethe is "to soak or saturate in a liquid." I think that would apply to the butter comment just fine.

Bicoastal said...

""Sickening sweet" is a saying fairly common in central PA."

Here in CA, we say "sickeningly" as in "Kate and Jon pretending to be struggling gives me a sickeningly feeling."

I'll bet my state's correct word usage against the Gosselins anyday.

Anonymous said...

Sickening sweet and sickeningly feeling are both incorrect. It should be that a treat is sickeningly sweet. Jon and kate give you a sickening (or sick) feeling. However, I should point out that both can be counted (if they are frequently used within a region) as within a dialect. Regional dialects are not wrong, just different. I chalk things like that not up to the fact that Jon or Kate is uneducated, just that their regional speech patterns and phrasing are different.

SmartyQ said...

Yeah, it is ironic that she corrects him constantly, since her grammar and vocabulary is actually far worse than his. Does anyone remember "sickening sweet" and "seething in butter"?

Missed those two, but I have a mental picture of the butter boiling and roiling in anger. I, however, didn't miss 'distractionary' items. I think Kate's pronunciation is fair game because she has said she wants a career as a public speaker.

Oh, and I'm a Californian, and I say 'our,' not 'are.'

Anonymous said...

Kate sets herself up by posing as an expert (by criticizing and correcting Jon's speech) when she, the paid public speaker, doesn't use correct grammar in her own speech. More examples of poor, insecure Kate puffing herself up to look better than anyone around her so she can feed her sad little ego. I really don't care about her pronunciation and word usage--I find her attempts at pretentiousness a joke--but Kate is her own worst enemy.

Anonymous said...

I'm from Montana, we say "are" for "our" as well. I looked it up on Webster's online and it's actually the first pronunciation listed:

Main Entry: our
Pronunciation: \är, ˈau(-ə)r\

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/our