"It doesn't take character..."

When watching Jon and Kate Plus 8, I keep wondering if I will find a reason to idolize them the way that others do. Aside from having a passel of kids, Jon and Kate Gosselin do not face any of the hardships or difficulties that many other families struggle with in a way that inspires me. ...continued

46 comments:

Serena said...

"IT DOESN'T TAKE CHARACTER..."

When watching Jon and Kate Plus 8, I keep wondering if I will find a reason to idolize them the way that others do. Aside from having a passel of kids, Jon and Kate Gosselin do not face any of the hardships or difficulties that many other families struggle with in a way that inspires me.

Neither Jon nor Kate have a chronic illness or disability of any kind. None of their children do, either (in spite of Kate's lament that Aaden isn't "normal" because he wears glasses). Apparently they don’t have to skimp on medical, dental, or eye care due to a lack of money or insurance. They don't have to worry where their next meal is coming from (they just wait for its free delivery); they don't have to choose between paying for utilities or buying shoes for their children.

Kate doesn’t have to raise the kids without a husband around, working two jobs to support them.

The Gosselins don't live in a war-torn country, or a country where they oppress women as second-class citizens. They haven’t had to rebuild their family’s life after a fire, tornado, flood, hurricane, or earthquake.

They have an abundance of help to get through any given day and ample time away from the children while traveling alone to various cities to snare money from unsuspecting churchgoers. They whine, sigh, moan, groan, complain, bicker, argue, nitpick, and constantly look for more, bigger, better -- even hinting around for the next donated trip while still enjoying the current donated trip.

So I wait, looking for an epiphany that lets me feel some Jon and Kate love. They are young, strong, and healthy. They have ample means to support their children in a comfortable lifestyle. They have a beautiful home in a nice neighborhood with a large spread for the kids to play on. They have received a steady shower of freebies, gifts, and donations for over four years. They have taken numerous lavish trips and outings far beyond the financial means of most smaller families. They have had their teeth whitened, tummy tucked, and hair transplanted... all at no charge to them. They have been interviewed and fawned over, and responded with deceit and misdirection.

It doesn't take character to accomplish what Jon and Kate have accomplished; it merely takes opportunism, greed, and a willingness to sell their children's childhood to the highest bidders.

So I am wondering if, one of these days, I will discover a reason that I can add Jon and Kate to my list of inspiring heroes as others have done. I mean, some reason besides them just being a family deliberately burgeoning as the result of fertility treatments, and then unconscionably pimping out the results. Then I will be happy to write them warm, fuzzy emails. I will go doe-eyed to see them speak and put generous "love offerings" in their basket and spend my hard-earned money to buy them gifts because I will finally be convinced that they are truly deserving.

Anonymous said...

Sorry to inform you, but you will not find a reason to give these people anything! ;)

Very well put. No, they won't have to decide between putting shoes on the kids feet or paying utilities. So I won't decide to take food from the mouths of my own children or money for their college funds to contribute to the next Gosselin excursion.

Anonymous said...

We all have a cross to bear. Sometimes it is one out of our own imaginations. I'm sure their lives were turned upside down when they had those babies. I'm sure they woke up in the early days after too little sleep and thought, "How are we going to do this?" I'm sure it was hell at first.

But then there comes a day when you think, "Dang, we did this, we've gotten through that?" You move on, you accept your lot in life and you choose to be happy. I'm still waiting for Kate to do that. I really believe that Jon seems to have done that, but goes along with Kate to get along with her.

That's a problem in and of itself. No one is requiring this woman to stand on her own two feet. She's crippled because of it, and she's crippling the family because of it.

Moons in Leo said...

Serena, beautifully written and so, so true.

Unfortunately, I don't think you will ever find a reason for idolizing them as long as you have a working brain.

Anonymous said...

Yep.

And then there's this family, who puts some things in perspective:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26408452/

Had 3 kids, gave birth to septuplets.

"I'm really scared," she [the mom] said, lying in her hospital bed in this Mediterranean coastal city. "We live in a mud hut with only two rooms. I don't know how we're going to afford 10 children now."

Khamis' husband Farag Mohammed Ali, a 31-year-old farm laborer, can find work only a few days a week, she said. "I'm really worried about what the future looks like."

Kate can take her exhaustion and stuff it.

FIONA said...

THE ONLY admiration I have for Kate is that she somehow managed to do what was necessary to keep those babies inside of her long enough! She does have will and determination. And I am thankful she has 6 healthy kids because of that determination-and perhaps her super uterus helped too!

I have never, ever understood how anyone could have admired her, looked up to her, thought she was a good mother!

But then there are people that take their little kids to R rated moives too! Alot of ignorance in this country, and that is more than sad!

CarolSue said...

Serena,
You said it all perfectly-
I haven't been able to relate to Kon on any level-They have been given 8 healthy children-That alone is enough-IMO,Kon is a bottomless pit, never to be filled-
Absolutely nothing to admire or aspire to- Maybe they are the warning of what not to do?

Steph said...

Right now, thousands of families are dealing with a spouse deployed overseas. Not only is the spouse at home single parenting, they often suffer an economic loss as well (in the case of National Guard & Reserves troops). On top of that, they are not even certain their spouse will come home healthy or at all.
I lost patience with these clowns long ago. Anyone noticed the irony of them allegedly being GIVEN an 8000 SF house while there is a foreclosure crisis? Or their many vacations when gas prices prevent many from visiting families in the next state?
Maybe people watch their show because they are living their own lives by proxy. They can pretend they are in Utah, or in North Carolina, or in Hawaii, while they can only sit in their house.

iluveeyore said...

I have actually read the e-mails on J/K's web site, praising them to the skies. One of the writers is blind; one is a 17-year-old girl. That in itself is telling. One writer has never even seen the kids smack each other or being pulled by their arms or Kate sitting with her arms crossed and scowling while the kids are trying to have some fun (decorating cupcakes). I'm rather surprised she cannot "hear" the disgust in Kate's voice about "messy" projects or the "icky" boys. The other writer -- well, she has very limited life experience. When I was 17, I too might have thought that Kate was wonderful... although I would hope that I might notice that something was "not quite right."

I think it is interesting that J/K have saved all these e-mails. I wonder if they print them out and tack them to their walls. These e-mails explain exactly why J/K think that they are A-list celebrities. They explain why J/K believe they need to continue the show because there are so many people who they are "helping." (The lady who spoke to Jon in Walmart was extremely lucky that she did not try to approach Kate. She would have been told "leave me alone.")

It's truly unfortunate that they don't realize that they are not helping their own children -- or their own marriage.

iluveeyore said...

Comment written by Anonymous, Moved from another post:

In the 12 years that I have had the internet in my... In the 12 years that I have had the internet in my home, I have never posted my opinion anywhere, for any reason. I am fully aware that my opinion does not matter. But, before the electricity goes out, I wanted to get one thing off of my mind. Last year as I flipped through the channels I run across this show. I literally watched two minutes before I decided that Kate was a perpetual drama queen. No big deal, I never gave the show another thought.

This past April I was staying with an Aunt, several days a week, who had had knee surgery. Yelp, she had one tv, and since she was the patient, and it was her house, I let her choose the channels. Again no big deal, I would just read, or play games on the computer. But, nevertheless J&K were on in the back ground noise. After about the third episode even in the back ground there was something about the show that started to irritate me. At first I couldn't figure out how one couple that I did not even know could get on my last nerve so fast.

Then it finally hit me, I suddenly realized what it was. No matter what kind of pretty package J&K want to put it in, the bottom line is that they are welfare-trash. Trust me as a life-long resident of central Louisiana, I can spot that kind a mile away. Not to be confused, welfare is not something received by the elderly, or those that find themselves in some kind of tempory hardship. In those cases, as compassionate human beings it is the least we can do. But welfare trash is those around here that spit out one kid after another, fully expecting society (ie taxpayers) to fund every aspect of their lives.

I have often feared that as I get up everyday to go to a job, that I hate, to support the one child that I do have (turned out that was all I could afford), if the welfare-trash that is sleeping late are laughing their asses off at me, because I am stupid enough to go to work, while they somehow figured out a way to get what they want for free while someone else pays for it. Bottom line is that I think J&K have done exactly that. No matter how uppity Kate wants to act, in reality they are just plain ole welfare trash, and not smart enough to realize, it is something they should be embarrassed about, not flaunting it on national tv.

Thank you for letting me say that, now if you will excuse me, I need to go check on some of the Gustav evacuees that are staying at the school in our rural area.

Barbara in VA said...

I could not agree with you more and thank you for putting into words what I was not able to articulate about the comparison to welfare mothers and Kon. I thought about that last night as I was watching people who truly need help being evacuated. Many of those people work at jobs just to keep body and soul together for themselves and their families. Why the scorn the middle-class has for welfare mothers is not here for Kon is unfathomable to me, too. Wake up, I want to shout! All that is different here is the color of their skin and the circumstances of their birth!! They are just better con artists than are others that you despise!

So thank you for saying it so well.

Barbara said...

Do you not all find it the least bit strange that the woman in WalMart wanted to talk to JON? Most women I know would not want to talk to a man about infertility. I was blessed to not have to deal with an infertility issue and had two children with no problems. I do understand that if you have those problems you need to talk and want to talk to someone who has been successfully through treatments. But, to want to talk to the man instead of the woman, complete strangers? That just makes no sense to me.

Renee said...

And then there's this family, who puts some things in perspective:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26408452/

Had 3 kids, gave birth to septuplets.

"I'm really scared," she [the mom] said, lying in her hospital bed in this Mediterranean coastal city. "We live in a mud hut with only two rooms. I don't know how we're going to afford 10 children now."

Khamis' husband Farag Mohammed Ali, a 31-year-old farm laborer, can find work only a few days a week, she said. "I'm really worried about what the future looks like."


Those people are just as irresponsible as J$K. They were completely impoverished and had fertility treatments anyway. Someone, anyone, needs to start campaigning against things like this gross abuse of technology. I'm not saying that people who want children shouldn't have them, quite the contrary. But J$K (and the Egyptian couple) already had children. That is where they became greedy in my mind, when they decided for "just one more" or "we needed to have a boy." The world is overpopulated, resources are being drained, and here are these people gambling with science and waiting to see what will happen. It's selfish and unethical, period.

Anonymous said...

Jon and Kate and the McCoughey's have it much better than unwed mothers. The Gosselins and McCougheys live in houses, have vans and college educations for their chidlren. Poor welfare mothers live in gang and drug areas, ride the bus, and don't have college educations provided for their children.

tmc said...

Serena:

I hope to the good Lord that Jon and Kate will read your post. I'm sure they will, and have no response (it would be actually interesting if Jon responded). I think everyone on this blog agrees with you as much as I do. Thank you for your thoughts.

themrs said...

thank you for posting this. i am one of a family that many times struggles simply to buy shoes for my four children. they live in mostly handmedowns, which i am sooo thankful for. i feel like a single mom, because my husband has to work long hours to support us. but on those days when i think i can't take anymore, i remind myself how blessed i am to have four beautiful healthy children, a marriage filled with love, respect & laughter, and a husband who works hard every day so i can stay home. it saddens me that kate will never realize any of those things about her own life.

dirtydisher said...

Yes, they ARE welfare people and Kate's uppity attitude is laughable and infuriating, but, their fan base seems to consist mostly of 12 year old girls who worship them. Look on You Tube, there's vid after vid of tweeny-boppers worshiping these greedy dumb as a stump people and wanting to be just like them. Setting the nasty scenes in J&K plus 8 to their silly music and drawing hearts around their insipid vacant faces. Until you can reach the youth that keeps this show on the air, I don't see how anything will change.

cardamom said...

"It doesn't take character to accomplish what Jon and Kate have accomplished..."
IMO, it takes an appalling LACK of character to "accomplish" what they did-- gaining material wealth and pseudo-celebrity at the expense of their children's privacy and their having a normal childhood.
Character is built on making the right choices because you know those choices are right--even if you don't want to--even if those choices would cause you inconvenience or hardship. Character means recognizing your faults, learning from your mistakes, and saying "I'm sorry." Character means stopping the production of a show that will only cause long-term pain for J&K's children, even though the material wealth may be reduced.

Sadly, J&K have chosen to make choices that they feel are justified in the name of material wealth.

Anonymous said...

but, their fan base seems to consist mostly of 12 year old girls who worship them. I know their fans act like they are teenyboppers not only from their barely literate over emotional posts and youtube videos but I fear they are just grossly immature adults. Is there any rating break down of what age group is watching this show? I just don't see the sponsors they have being targeted at tweens and teens.

pullthegosselinplug said...

I keep looking for that website for people that started out NOT LIKING Kate and realized after watching numerous shows how wrong they were about her and how great a friend, wife, daughter, mother and role model for christians she is. Where is that website? Does it exist?
The bottom line is a person cannot succeed being any of those things if they fail at the broader category of decent human being.

Anonymous said...

"Sadly, J&K have chosen to make choices that they feel are justified in the name of material wealth."

And all the while using God's name as the voice of reason behind it all being so!

Anonymous said...

It must be nice that Kate can "afford" organic. As a mother of 3 I would love to be able to buy more organic. However when organic milk is 6.25 for a half-gallon and organge juice is 8.25, I can't justify it with all the other expenses. They will never know the true struggles of families who work hard for what they have.

Anonymous said...

THE ONLY admiration I have for Kate is that she somehow managed to do what was necessary to keep those babies inside of her long enough! She does have will and determination. And I am thankful she has 6 healthy kids because of that determination-and perhaps her super uterus helped too!

I can't admire this because she really had no control over it. Her body just happened to be able to carry 6 babies. To say that it was because of her will and determination is insulting to moms who have lost babies and weren't able to carry them to term. I am sure if you ask any mom who has lost a baby they were just as determined to do everything right to carry their child long enough for it to survive. That is determined by ones own individual body. Just like someone who can conceive without fertily meds isn't any more determined to get pregnant. This isn't something that can be controlled by someones will power or determination.

Anonymous said...

If you will think about what you ought to do for other people, your character will take care of itself. Character is a by-product, and any man who devotes himself to its cultivation in his own case will become a selfish prig.
— Woodrow Wilson, 28th American president (1856-1924)

I think it's safe to say J&K have ZERO in the character department.

Barbara in VA said...

I don't think the fans of Kon are 12 year old kids. I think kids are basically honest and any one of them who sees kate's famous temper rain down upon Jon or one of the children (gumgate etc.) would be shocked and appalled. I think these are, as you said, very immature but grown people who may very well act like she does in some ways and so are jumping on the bandwagon to justify their own actions. 12 year old kids would love to see the kids on the show, no doubt about that, but admire Tammy Kate? Oh, I don't think so.

Barbara in VA said...

So, Anon 1:53, what can they possibly say at these "speeches" they give to people like you and me who have to worry about paying the difference between regular and organic and would make these folks dig deep and give them money? I can't fathom what it could be. If the audience watches the show they know how much more Kon has than the normal family without even working for it. So what in the world can their message be that so many people still buy into it?

Change said...

Here is how I see it. If you know you can't afford another kid and you go ahead and have one, that is bad parenting skills and irresponsibility. But if you have the money then who cares how many kids you have as long as were not paying for it with our taxes

Lonnyswife said...

Hi moderators-
Noticed you moved another 'mis-placed comment so perhaps you can do the same with mine?
Just caught a bit of a repeat (TLC running back to back to back repeats until the new epi tonight). They were having photos taken at Beth and Bob's. Was it called Photo Shoot?? The photog referred to the location as a beautiful estate......I could just see the lust ( or was that jealousy Kate?) in Kate's eyes. Anyway, I just wanted to say, how sad it is that Auntie Beth isn't in the kids' lives anymore. I am assuming as much, perhaps Julie or Jodi can expound. Beth was being so kind and gentle while she was doing the girl's hair, happy to open her home. How does one explain to Thalia (sp?) about why the twins don't come over anymore. It's not that I don't believe the falling out was over the payment or actually the non-payment issues. I just can't fathom that someone would divorce themselves from people who truly seemed invested in the kids over a pitiful little paycheck. Beth and Bob certainly don't look like they need money. They might have even donated it to a worthy cause, IN THE G'S NAME!!! I don't know them or their situation but they come across as people who would do something like that. Maybe even sponsor some REAL needy children's Christian private schooling.
It's beyond laughable that everyone who has appeared and now disappeared on that show are the ones who came off looking the most loving, giving, and unselfish.
IMHO, what we are left with is the parental-unit (i started with 'adults' and that just didn't fit these two) "stars" coming across as a couple of meglomaniacs!

What is a megalomaniac?
Someone who craves power, wealth, status, or genius to the point of mania or someone who believes that they are ridiculously powerful. It's can alternatively be termed 'delusions of grandeur'.
(from Wikipedia)

Anonymous said...

In the episode on disclipine, you can see Kate pulling down a book from the kitchen cabinet and starting to look through it and it looks like a recipe book.

In the Korean food episode, Kate is screaming at Jon to get out of the kitchen because "she has to make lunch." Now we all know that this is a total lie, since lunch has been catered to her. what a frickin liar!

Anonymous said...

I guess the stress is too much. What is she to do now? If I was her I would pull the plug and do the best I could. I do know that once bridges are burned it's harder to cross back over and begin again. I think I would go back to everyone I hurt and apologize and let the chips fall where they may and start my life anew with my hubby and 8 kids. I don't think this will happen, but it seems reasonable to me.

sabrinasmom said...

In the episode on disclipine, you can see Kate pulling down a book from the kitchen cabinet and starting to look through it and it looks like a recipe book.

She also states that real cooks don't need recipes. It's minor, but it adds to the list of "well, which one is it?"

pullthegosselinplug said...

Excellent Point, Anon 4:14!
So, if "craft services" provides the food on the busy shooting days, anytime we see Kate preparing anything in the kitchen is definitely staged.
Boy, the hole is getting deeper and deeper.
I heard someone say once that some people's truth has absolutely nothing to do with the facts.
It sure applies to these 2 wingnuts.

Anonymous said...

In the Korean food episode, Kate is screaming at Jon to get out of the kitchen because "she has to make lunch." Now we all know that this is a total lie, since lunch has been catered to her. what a frickin liar!

What I can't figure out was what is so elaborate about the lunches she feeds those kids anyway? She gives them 4 or 5 grapes, a few slices of apple, and a couple slices of cheese. I haven't ever really seen those kids get much more for lunch than that. She didn't have to be in the kitchen for that.

Anonymous said...

"It must be nice that Kate can "afford" organic. As a mother of 3 I would love to be able to buy more organic. "

According to Kate, feeding her family organic is a 'gift' that she and Jon can give the children and they ( J & K) go 'without' and skimp in other areas in order to afford feeding their children organic. In all apearances, J & K are neither doing without or skimping !

Anonymous said...

It would be fitting that Jon and Kate show has captured some young viewers. I have read that this generation of children are the all about me generation. They are into material things and themselves more so than any other generation. Sound familiar. That is why they can relate to Kon so much.

Anonymous said...

THE ONLY admiration I have for Kate is that she somehow managed to do what was necessary to keep those babies inside of her long enough! She does have will and determination. And I am thankful she has 6 healthy kids because of that determination-and perhaps her super uterus helped too!

I can't admire this because she really had no control over it. Her body just happened to be able to carry 6 babies. To say that it was because of her will and determination is insulting to moms who have lost babies and weren't able to carry them to term. I am sure if you ask any mom who has lost a baby they were just as determined to do everything right to carry their child long enough for it to survive. That is determined by ones own individual body. Just like someone who can conceive without fertility meds isn't any more determined to get pregnant. This isn't something that can be controlled by someones will power or determination.

I agree, it wasn't just will and determination. It was due to the fact that she was on bedrest at a hospital being monitored and treated due to her high risk. Those of us that lost our single child wasn't because we weren't determined or had a lack of will, it's because since we were not considered high risk we went about the normal activities of life where were took care of an older child, our husbands and home. There is no way to compare the benefits of around the clock care given to a woman at risk to the fact that when they have no idea that you may be at risk that when problems develop you are too far away to get the help you may need to stop the preterm labor in time to save the baby. I credit the hospital, nurses and doctors that ensured those babies stayed long enough to survive outside the womb, not Kate.

Anonymous said...

there was a kon marathon on yesterday, and as I was running outside to the grill cooking burgers, I had it on. The one thing I have noticed is that Kate never, never, NEVER says thank you to anyone...not to Jodi for watching the kids, not to Janet for folding her clothers, not to Beth, not to the poor woman who opened her bakery on a Sunday so they could decorate cupcakes...she is a self absorbed b*tch who thinks all should cater to her...and her husband should take a look at himself on TV, talk about a ball-less wonder...these people make me sick!

Anonymous said...

My husband and I went to stay with some friends this weekend and came to realise that their marriage was in serious trouble. I suddenly realized that the couple had a very very similar dynamic as KON. They have one child. It was such an uncomfortable, tenision filled home that I wanted to leave and drive the three hours back home. Their son is 8 and is well aware of the issues between the parents - I can't imagine what it would be like with more kids. The level of resentment in that house makes you feel like you are drowning. The irony is that the wife can't stand Kon...It makes me sad for the kid(s)in both relationships.

Anonymous said...

I think the proper term is a J&K "Konathon."

Yes, I find Kate to be quite dismissive of people- the attitude is sort of "how can you serve me???"

I also thought it was strange how she started reacting more to the boys last night - and imagine, J&K don't read these blogs?!?!?!

Samantha said...

I think the proper term is a J&K "Konathon."



comment of the week nomination

Barbara in VA said...

How will Kon keep the scam going with the churches if they have another child, either adopt or have one themselves? I thought their whole gig was that, you know, poor us, we never counted on having all these children and we're like the little old woman who lived in a shoe (except we want a mansion and warm weather, limos and organic chefs, fancy clothes and trips for free). No, seriously, how do you think they would spin that, God forbid?

Anonymous said...

Last night's damage control included:
Giving money to the Ronald McDonald House
Using please and thank you more
Talking to some of the boys
Not screeching and hitting Jon
Tears (I'm human, people)

Anonymous said...

Oh, I know...the tears were a wonderful touch. I think I worry most about Mady and Cara. They are so neglected and marginalized. (Mady's our drama queen; Cara is just quiet) These two girls (mady especially) love the "babies" but clearly resent their parents for being relegated to the sidelines in this sideshow.
Imagine when these girls get older. Their bills for therapy will be astronomical.

Barbara in VA said...

But don't worry, Kon, you won't have to pay the therapy bills. Either you will have distanced yourself from the twins because they were just not able to "understand" or you will have figured out a way to get their therapy for free. Either way I'm sure the impact on you will be minimal.

Barbara in VA said...

Oh, and when we saw the video of Kon's wedding did anyone notice that the rather short man escorting Kate, I assume that was her father but don't know for sure, his face was blurred out? I found that very odd if he was her father or indeed another relative.

Anonymous said...

'These two girls (mady especially) love the "babies" but clearly resent their parents for being relegated to the sidelines in this sideshow.'

The twins aren't the cash cows the tups are. What good is that? Could it be the resentment works two ways? Give it a year or two and then we'll be watching Kate cry REAL tears when the girls ask to go live at Aunt Jodi's or Beth's home. And I emphasize the word HOME. This whole thing is sad, sad, sad.