Is Kate toxic?

Given Kate's lack of interest in the boys and her outright poor treatment of Joel, the preference for Hannie (yuckie babyish nickname), knobgate, gumgate, and the Jabba the Hutt performance during the dressup show just to name a few, is Kate toxic to her kids at this point? Is she narcisstic or just immature and selfish or both?

Jon and Kate parody

Tom and Trix Plus Six, a Jon and Kate Plus 8 parody, has updated with a new chapter. It's GumGate time!

Good Ol' Jon

This is a post from Television Without Pity. Whether or not it's true, we do not know. You may make your own decision.

MadPanda: (Post#803)

I just can not believe what Jon Gosselin has been reduced to. What possessed him to think it was cool to get hairplugs? I just hate to see him at Kate's beck and call as bitch and manservant. I just want him to stand up to the woman. I personally have nothing against Kate but it upsets me to see him cut down as he always is by his wife.What happened to him? I wonder if it's the newfound fame or the overwhelming task of fathering 8 little ones.I ask this as someone who knew Jon in his glory days.......and it saddens me to see him in this state.I know this may be hard to believe given his new plugs (why Jon why?!?!) and the edit of lackluster/childish personality but Jon was quite the heartthrob in his heyday. My oldest sister dated him and this was a while back and I was a lot younger and more immature in those days but I was in L-O-V-E with him. With a capital L-U-V. I still have notebooks with "(name withheld) Gosselin" doodled all over with squiggly hearts. I resented my sister greatly during the time period when they were hot 'n' heavy.I hope I don't get shot down for saying this but Jon was kind of like a Luke Perry type. Ridiculously good looking (the camera does not do him justice.....those eyes....they will melt you) and with a constant blase coolness. It drove my sister nuts. And all of her friends. And me.It didn't matter that he lived with his mother or he didn't have any ambitions. He was just the epitome of cool. And that's all that mattered in those days. In all my interactions with him I have to say he was a really nice, conversational guy. Really socially oriented. Not exactly life of the party but a good addition.And I won't be vulgar or anything but despite the lack of expressing emotions properly he apparently was very good at physical affections. Kissing, cuddling, hugs, and the like. ;-)Now I tune in to see him get ridiculed and condescended towards, slapped, and look miserable. :sigh: I do enjoy seeing him with his adorable children. I always envisioned he'd be a good father when I fantacized about our lives together, when I was younger of course. Lol.I noticed Jon has been getting ridiculed a lot for his hairplug decision. I totally understand, it's very W-T-F. And he has been acting kind of immature and hostile in some episodes. I just wanted to let it be known that once upon a time Jon was a very sweet, cool guy who was just totally awesome and he would laugh just as much as anyone over balding men with hairplugs. It looks like he's gone off the deep end is all.

ZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

It has been quite a while since a new item was posted here.

I think that Jon & Kate plus 8 has gone the way of the dinosaur. The final straw was probably the dressing up in play outfits while Kate watched from a mattress. Maddy stomped around. Alexis screamed at the top of her lungs. Neither one was disciplined at all. But Lord knows what poor Joel did to rate the death stare (play favorites much, Kate?). Kate gave Jon orders ("I want these kids in bed in 20 minutes"). I'm not sure which would be more exciting -- watching grass grow or paint dry.

Tooth whitening? Jon and Kate dining out without the kids? What in the world are the producers/writers thinking? (I actually doubt that they ARE thinking.) There is no way on earth that they are going to be able to prolong this show for another 40 episodes.

I doubt very much that anyone really cares any more. It is totally unpleasant (not to mention boring) to view this show. As they say in "the business," the show has jumped the shark.

Just the Cash Please

The following e-mail is from one of the organizers of the Gosselin's speaking engagement at Ingells Avenue Baptist Church in Pascagoula, Mississippi. The Gosselins will be speaking there on June 1, 2008. Bold type has been added for emphasis.

It is obvious that the Gosselins are asking to have a love offering passed around for them AND are selling autographed pictures. Many people wonder why the Gosselins are asking for cash only....

QUOTE
Hi everyone!!I need a confirmation from everyone so that we can nail our reservation list this week! Email me your contact information and how many ticket that you need. (just in case they have increased or decreased). I need this back ASAP!! Cut and paste the below info.Also, Kate has told me that they will be selling autographed pictures for a fee of $20. They will only accept cash for these. As most of you know also, we will be taking a love offering for the Gosselins. This is going directly to them. They don't "charge" to come down, but do ask that we take up a love offering. So come prepared to "give back". Hope to see all of you soon!mary

"Kate Supporters Are a Strange Breed"

We found this article recently - it certainly mirrors some of my thoughts. Particularly:

"5. Most of her Christian supporters are judgmental hypocrites! The angry Christians did some of the strongest judging. Go figure. Those comments were surely written only for my amusement. Thank you for the laughs."

My absolutely favorite comment from a Kate supporter can be found here. Jenn Pastore comments (bolding hers):

"The Television Without Pity board collectively has some of the most vicious, vile, and hypocritical assholes I have ever encountered, in real life and on the internet. It is sad and sickening to see how some people will stoop so low to judge another person so callously and harshly. I've read some claim to be Christians and yet they point the finger of judgement towards Kate. If they were true Christians, they would know it is not their place to judge another human being. It is disheartening to see some of the bashing Kate endures on the net. Not one of these black-hearted posters allow a single positive thought about Kate which just shows me how they are so steeped in their own negativity and wouldn't know a glass half full if it smacked them in the face. I would love to see any of these people who criticize and nitpick to the bone, walk a day in Kate's shoes and see how well they handle the stress. I predict none of them would fare too well given how hot and bothered they get over someone like Kate Gosselin. I mean really. Hardly a controversial figure in this day and age.

Sorry for the rant. I guess this is the world we live in where anonymous nobodies get to postulate their idiotic and hate driven opinions. Sigh. For all the judging they do, we will see what kind of judgement they receive in the end."

So Jenn - by calling people "vicious, vile, and hypocritical assholes", aren't you judging them? I guess you will see what kind of judgment you will receive in the end. The sheer hypocrisy in this comment is entertaining.

For the record, I am not a Christian. And I can say positive things about Kate - she did a great job of delivering six healthy babies, and she does try to make holidays special for her family, for example. It's just that I can also observe negative things that her supporters are blind to. It's like I have Kate-ray vision or something. :-)

Gosselins Without Pity - A Poem

When I started my blog, I wanted to write about the TLC reality shows that make up a large part of my TV viewing. In the process, I've come to some, not very positive comments about the Gosselin family, at least the parents, I love the kids. I liked this show at first, but was struck right from the beginning by Kate's treatment of Jon. She picks on her husband, puts him down, and actually slaps him in the face, something she refers to as love taps. After I began reading message boards about this show, I realized that others felt the same way, and then I began to have doubts about her parenting. As I learned more about the Gosselins, my view of them began to deteriorate. These people are using their children to bring themselves fame and fortune, lots of gifts from sponsors, love offerings at speaking engagements, a book deal, and TLC paying for trips and home improvement. Meanwhile, the eight kids are growing up with overhead television lights in their homes, and cameras filming their every move. Their personalities are dissected by their parents in front of a viewing audience, and that same audience saw the tups, toilet trained, bathed, and berated for childhood misdeeds. It can't be a healthy situation to grow up in, and while I continue to watch, I'm no longer really a fan. The poem below expresses my present feelings about Jon and Kate.


Jon and Kate are the parents of eight
But they don’t need your pity
After all, they’re sitting pretty.
Their dispositions aren’t sunny,
But they sure are making money!

Those appearances they make
Are really somewhat fake.
They get paid to appear,
And tell their story for folks to hear.
Picture postcards are sold
Those cute kids are really gold!
Then donations the believers bestow
“How, “ says Kate, “could I say no?”

Kate felt the need to berate
All the tups during knobgate
She threw Collin’s bear away
Because he got gum on it one day
Older daughter, Mady, is made to seem bratty
Helpers, kind and sweet,
They tend to mistreat
Kate slaps Jon
And their sniping goes on and on.

The meaning and the moral of this real life story:
Lots and lots of children means lots and lots of glory
So if you have sextuplets, don’t flip your lids
Go on TV and make a fortune off your kids!

Contributed by RKwrite

I Feel Sorry for Mady

Mady seems like the kind of person who would thrive being an only child, or perhaps just one of two. Not because she is an attention whore or spoiled or bratty, but she strikes me as very smart and would probably love to be involved in various projects all the time if she had an adult willing to lead the way.

She'd be the kind of kid who would love working on her Science Fair project and would spend weeks getting it totally awesome... if an adult had the time to sit with her and give a little focused guidance. When she gets older, she'd probably be the type who would love to work little odd jobs to save up money for Space Camp in the summer. She would probably enjoy getting involved in local politics or volunteer work, she would probably earn a bunch of badges if she were a Girl Scout and sell a bunch of cookies, etc., etc... in other words, she could probably go as far as an adult would be willing to lead her.

Only she is stuck in a gaggle of other kids with a narcissistic, self-absorbed mother and an ineffectual father, followed by cameras constantly, dragged around the country, and constantly marginalized, demeaned, dismissed, and badmouthed right in front of her.

I feel sorry for Mady.

What's Kate's Excuse?

It's really hard to tell from a distance what is behind someone's behavior, but like other viewers I've talked to, I think there is an element of abuse or at least ill treatment in Kate's past. That sort of damage to the childhood psyche can manifest itself in several ways -- including coloring everything about how they view their past.

She could now be thinking of herself as having been quite deprived materially, hence the negative comments about how she never got to "go anywhere" growing up. It would be a way to make her a victim while distancing herself from the actual abuse -- if she was abused, it would mean that she was bad and not worthy. If she were simply "poor", it would help let her off the hook.

It could explain her apparent treatment of Jon as merely someone she can control and upon whom she can heap her frustration and disdain.

It could also explain how she seems completely incapable of feeling any maternal bond with her children. Speaking for myself, that bond is incredibly strong and powerful, and while it may not make me a perfect mother, it absolutely prevents me from treating my children the way that Kate treats hers. I could never live with the guilt of thinking that my own cruelty was causing my children emotional distress -- but Kate seems not only unfazed by that thought, she seems totally oblivious to the possibility.

Anyway, who really knows... but Kate's horrible treatment of those around her seem much too pathological to be just a spoiled brat acting out of resentment -- she seems to be acting out hurt and rage that didn't have a place to go when she was a child. Not that I have any sympathy for her; if that's true, there are plenty of adults who cared enough to seek therapy and course correct so as not to perpetuate the cycle.

There is No End to the Insanity

I am concerned about their parenting skills as well. Madelyn can't go a week without getting slammed by one or both of her parents. Cara races a scooter (to catch up to her dad's rollerblading) without a helmet. Joel is sick with a stomach bug and a fever and vomits on his comforter. Kate puts him on the floor in the laundry room because he "increased her laundry." (Not that she really completes her own laundry...she has minions who fold, iron and put it away.) She bailed out of her son's "one-on-one" trips, although both parents went with their daughters. She was upset that her son Aaden was not "perfect" when he had to get glasses. Jon mocks Joel's speech impediment. Kate had a tantrum and threw a toy grill down the stairs, and angrily interrogated the boys about a dresser knob. Finally, Kate threatened to throw away Collin's security item because he committed the cardinal sin of getting gum on it.I am sure I can think of more...

The Crayola factory nightmare. Apparently, Kate is an ignorant wench who is unaware that Crayola markers are washable, and have been for at least ten years. And she made the guys delivering her FREE piano remove their shoes... even though it was the same carpeting they removed less than a month later. I do believe men moving pianos are entitled to keep their steel-toed boots on... as a matter of fact, I think it is a law.

submitted by eeyorestl

The Crazies Are All Over the Place

It is obvious from the links on this site that there are dozens of fanatics out there who are worshipping the Gosselins. (These links exist. You might have to join Facebook to access them... or find them on Google.)

The contributors to this site easily found those blogs. The links on YouTube are too numerous to link to.

If I were Jon or Kate, I'd be extremely upset that my kids have become internet personalities. I would want to get off the TLC treadmill as quickly as possible and try to return to a normal life.
And NO, their life isn't anywhere near "normal" at this time. It's really too bad that the children have become "used to" the tv people, but they seem to have lost a lot of people* in their short lives, and I'm sure they would cope.

*Grandma Kreider, friend Susan, et al.

Where Do I Begin?

There is so much that can be said about Kate Gosselin (and Jon is beginning to follow suit):

Kate:

. Put a sick, feverish, vomiting child down on the laundry room floor on a thin blanket... this was after yelling at him for vomiting on his comforter

. Allows her 3-year-olds to watch videos of their show, letting them see their mother smacking their father and talking about the kids' personalities and behavior

. Denigrates her husband while talking to her children ("Daddy is mean. Ignore him." "Daddy doesn't care about your safety.")

. Blatantly "plays favorites," e.g., comforting Hannah when she cried because Kate was leaving and giving Joel time-out because he cried for daddy. She also accompanied each girl (all 5) for their "day out" and ignored the boys.

. Totally ignores the fact that her children have been televised on the potty and being bathed, disallowing them any dignity or privacy (from the video crew and the viewing audience). These views have shown up all over the internet.

. Seems to be trying to keep her sextuplets as babies as long as possible... instead of teaching them to be self-sufficient... sippy cups, being dressed, et al.

. Does not seem to be teaching her children any self-control or inter-personal abilities. They need to interact with children other than relatives. She usually does not intervene when they have altercations. They bite, smack, scream, etc.

. Does not let the children be children. For example, at the Crayola "factory," she would not let her kids play with WASHABLE markers, not even the twins. When Jon asked "Can't they have fun?" she replied "Not these kids." What kind of mother would say such a thing? She was concerned that it might make more work for her. She is petrified that they might get dirty.

. Terrorized her child because he got a little gum on his teddy bear. She threatened to throw it away, while he cried his heart out.

Jon:

. Competed against his children (hide and seek), cheated, and gloated when he won!

. Makes fun of Joel's lisp.

. Was blatantly bored during his day out with Joel.

. Made fun of Collin saying "thank you" after he assisted him during his constipation. I'm really impressed that Collin said thank you.

. Sat in the garage playing with his new cell phone while he was supposed to be watching/playing with his children.

The list can go on and on. I imagine that it could be never-ending. Please feel free to add to this list if you see fit.

________________________________________________________

P.S. I noticed that "Golden Snitch" was very upset because the speaking engagements are "their only source of income" and nasty people are trying to stop them! What in the world ever happened to Jon's "job"?

There was also one episode in which Jon said "Kate was taking care of business so I got to watch the kids." What business is Kate in?

There are just so many reasons to be disgusted with this couple.

Why I'm a "Hater"

Like many people, I enjoyed the first couple of specials. Adorable kids, she's kinda mean, but it was pleasant viewing.

Once the series started and people started talking, I realized how much hypocrisy there is.

For example, if you go to the FAQ page on the Gosselins' own website, they state:
Contrary to popular belief, none of our kids have been given a college scholarship nor are there any funds set up in any accounts to pay for college!!! That is another area where we are trusting the Lord to provide when that time comes!!!!! Scary, but necessary!!!!! :)

But a little Googling reveals that on the sextuplets' first birthday, the Lt-Governor of Pennsylvania announced that tuition accounts had been set up for all eight Gosselin children.

One TWoP reader hypothesised that perhaps the parents didn't know about this. Um, this was announced at the birthday party. I think Jon & Kate would have been there ...

Another hypothesis is that nobody has actually donated to the funds, which I doubt. My personal opinion is that (a) Jon & Kate have no control over the funds so therefore they don't exist (b) mentioning the funds, even giving directions on how to donate, on their website diminishes their portrait of themselves as people in need.

Once I realized this deception, I started looking more closely at the situation, and I guess I became one of the "haters". I don't call Child Protective Services on them, I don't e-mail churches where the parents will appear, I have no idea where the girls go to school - but since I don't speak of the parents in glowing terms, I get classified as a "hater". And believe or not, I don't spend my free time Googling the Gosselins.

Want to know another way that they portray themselves as in need? They go to speaking engagements and tell of how hard it was for them in beginning. And I do believe it was hard for them, I am sure they were overwhelmed.

But now? They are selling photos of themselves and their kids. If you have a Facebook account, you can see one of the pictures with some comments here.

Note that the person who bought a picture said "THAT postcard was $20 the regular-sized ones were $10...i just had to tell myself...ok, poor college student, it's for a good cause! lol"

I think college students are more of a good cause than the Gosselins! The Gosselins have all sorts of freebies given to them, they are not a good cause any more. Except for the college funds. ;-)

Jon & Kate Gosselin Gratitude

This is the time each morning that I make my gratitude list to start my day. This grounds me and hopefully turns those especially stressful days in my corner into something of value and accomplishment.

I am Christian, have mentioned it before and give God Thanks and Praise for my gratitude list. I know there is a full spectrum of places to send one's gratitude to, and I respect every individual choice. I share this as it's especially bothersome for me to observe the Gosselin form of Christian gratitude, I try to say this without judgement, but I do have my human weaknesses.

A growing number of years ago I was laid off the day after 9/11. Creative director at a Chicago ad agency that was hit hard by the last recession that hit the web sector especially badly. I was the highest paid/first to go scenario. We were a two income family with a blend of 6 remarkable children, 4 in college. We had a home large and beautiful enough to accommodate these beautiful children in an affluent suburb. I was also taking anti-depressants, as my life was too busy and agency life can be very chew you up and spit you out, as I experienced first hand.

I applied for every position available for a year, but no one was hiring. I started building my own client base, and am Blessed with where it has grown to this day. My second marriage was in trouble. Charming man, everyone loved him. He was a great stepdad, other than the fact that he couldn't treat his stepchildren's mother with enough respect to not cheat on her. A funny thing about me? I cannot abide adultery in my own life. The marriage ended, the house was sold and I found a place we could afford, my children and I. It's smaller, but beautiful and warm and it's been my home since then. My children come and go with happiness and fun. My youngest is still in college, and still here with me, much to his dismay ;-)

I was thinking back this morning to that first year in this smaller home. I shake my head and wonder how I took the leap to leave. My income could have been sorely inadequate and I could have easily been on the street. Every bill got paid, however, and every child was able to continue working toward their degree. It was blind faith, could have been stupid faith. I do give Thanks and Praise for coming through those times as well as we have. I prayed for guidance and assistance, but never expected it to be in the form of handouts, only to give me enough strength to provide for myself and my children with my own abilities. I do my best to give back with service to those in need.

This is why I am so saddened and conflicted with the Gosselin story of "God will provide". I am conflicted with their blatant materialism, hypocritically opposed to what they speak about on the church circuit. I am saddened that this able-bodied and blessed couple is so incensed with keeping up the charade that they bully and try to make disappear every opposing opinion that they can, rather than taking the criticism to heart. I am saddened that they don't count their blessings, and do something to pay it forward, spiritually, emotionally and financially, from the heart. I am saddened that they are taking love offerings from those that have less than they do.

Upcoming Gosselin Speaking Engagements

Here is a list of the upcoming Gosselin speaking engagements. For detailed ticket/contact information, some of the entries below are clickable:

July 11 & 12, 2008 - Highest Praise Tabernacle (
Goldsboro, NC)
(Sold Out)

July 25, 2008 - National Organization of Mothers of Twins Club, Inc. Annual Convention 2008 (Boston, MA)

August 17, 2008 - Wesley United Methodist Church (Quarryville, PA)

September 14, 2008 - Cornerstone Christian Fellowship (Abington, PA)

September 27 & 28, 2008 - New Life Community Church (NLCC) (Alexandria/Pineville, LA)

October 19, 2008 - First Assembly of God (Waynesburg, PA)

November 1, 2008 - Airline Baptist Church (Bossier City, LA)

November 2, 2008 - Central Assembly of God (Bossier City, LA)

November 1 & 2, 2008 - Noel United Methodist Church (Shreveport, LA)

November 14 & 15, 2008 - Women of Purpose Conference (Hershey, PA)

January 10 & 11, 2009 - First Assembly of God (Marcy, NY)

January 23, 2009 - Mission Hills Church (Mission Viejo, CA)

January 24, 2009 - Mount of Olives Church (Mission Viejo, CA)

January 25, 2009 - Bible Fellowship Church (Ventura, CA)

March 20, 2009 - Roswell UMC (Roswell, GA)